In the fairy tales, when Prince Charming rides off with his true love on the back of that white horse, “happily ever after” isn’t just assumed — it’s pretty much in the bag. But in real life, that sunset that you’re galloping off into can still give you sunburn, and that happily-ever-after is kind of a joke. Finding love can change your life in a lot of beautiful ways, but there are some things that being a relationship just can’t change:
Your self-esteem won’t magically fix itself. The boost in confidence that you get when he compliments you might last for a while, but at the end of the day, your insecurities are going to need a lot more than just an occasional pick-me-up to thwart. Taken girls can be just as insecure as single ones — so while your true love might think you’re the most beautiful girl in the world, if you don’t believe it yourself, he won’t change that.
You won’t stop crushing on other people. Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you don’t still see things that you find deeply attractive in other people. Developing an innocent crush on someone other than your One True Love is totally normal, and having a real boyfriend will never make your feelings for your favorite celebrity man candy fade away.
Getting up in the morning will still suck. You might think that having someone else to roll over and wake up to in the mornings will make that alarm clock sound so much sweeter — but no such luck. Mornings are still mornings, no matter who you’re sharing your bed with, and 6 AM spin class isn’t any easier to go to just because your man sends you good morning texts.
None of your bad habits will suddenly go away. It’s natural to hope that now that you’ve got someone to shape up for, you’ll finally get around to breaking all your worst habits. In reality, though, it takes a lot more than just having someone around to call you out on your nail biting or zit popping in order to knock that nonsense off for good. Like it or not, just because you’re with someone else doesn’t mean you stop being you (in all your dysfunctional glory).
You’ll still need your handy dandy vibrator. Even though it’s nice to have intimacy on tap, your libidos won’t always sync up perfectly — so even though you might be tempted to toss your electronic boyfriend, it might be wise to keep him around for a little while longer. There will be early mornings, late nights and plenty of times in between when you’ll be up for a little friskiness when your man is not, and sometimes, a girl just has to take care of things herself.
You won’t turn into a slob overnight. You might have heard about gals with boyfriends gaining weight or letting themselves go, but just because you’ve bagged your man doesn’t mean you’ll stop wanting to look cute. You don’t just dress up for attention from dudes, after all — you dress up for you (and more importantly, to impress other girls with your mad fashion sense and sick makeup skills).
Your other life problems (unfortunately) will still exist. Problems at work, struggles with school and clashes with your family are all still 100% present and accounted for, even if you wish they’d disappeared the moment that your relationship status changed on Facebook. Your man probably didn’t come equipped with a fairy godmother who could wave her wand and vanish all your troubles and worries (and if he did, you’d better lock that down fast).
You’ll still get lonely. Loneliness isn’t just a single girl problem — even girls in the healthiest of committed relationships still feel a little alone from time to time. Even the best boyfriends aren’t always around every time you need them, which is why it’s so important not to ditch your squad just because you’re suddenly half of a couple. Everyone gets lonely, no matter how much love they’ve got in their lives — so the best thing to do is learn how to handle being alone with grace.
Creepy dudes will still hit on you. Sometimes, even “I have a boyfriend,” isn’t enough to deter a grade-A creeper — because some dudes just do not care. When a simple “no” won’t suffice and the threat of your man coming back at any moment can’t make an unwanted stranger back down, it’s time to accept that creepy guys are a plague that not even taken girls are safe from (even though we wish they’d just go away, period).
You’ll still wonder if the grass isn’t greener on the other side. Even if you spent the whole of your single girl days bemoaning the fact that you didn’t have a boyfriend, when you find love in your life you come to realize that being single did have it’s perks. Remembering what it was like to flirt with whoever you wanted and never have to share your food with anyone might actually make you miss your single girl days. There’s no telling what’s best for you until you’ve experienced it all and made the decision for yourself.
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