11 Comments That Make You Sound Insecure

Have you ever had your boyfriend or even your friends tell you that you’re kind of needy? The comment may offend you, but maybe you should take a look in the mirror. You could be truly lacking self-confidence, or maybe that’s just the way you come across. Either way, saying any of the following are going to make you seem insecure:

  1. “I love you more than you love me.” Insecure women have a tendency to worry about an inequality in their relationship. It’s one thing to worry whether or not you love your boyfriend more than he loves you, but it’s a whole different story if you express these feelings out loud on a regular basis.
  2. “I feel fat.” Most women are guilty of this, and it’s OK to not feel 100 perfect about our bodies every once in a while. Still, if you’re the girl constantly complaining about this, only to feel better when your friend or lover assures you of your envious bod, it’s a sign of greater insecurity.
  3. “You called her your best friend.” Insecurity doesn’t only appear in romantic relationships, it’s present in friendships, too. If you’re jealous that your bestie has other friends, you need a reality check. Stop seeing every new friend as a replacement and start appreciating the beauty of your own friendship.
  4. “I trust you. I just don’t trust her.” If your boyfriend hanging out with other women constantly bothers you, it’s always a jealousy issue, and jealousy is insecurity. If you trust him, then you’re trusting that nothing is going to happen, despite what her intentions may be.
  5. “Is she single?” Your boyfriend has a new coworker who just so happens to be a woman. If the first words out of your mouth are, “Is she single?” then you both know exactly what you meant. If you’re jealous of every female your boyfriend encounters, you need to get a hold of yourself.
  6. “Is she prettier than me?” Are you really asking your boyfriend to compare you to another woman? What do you expect him to say? You’ll never know if you got an honest answer, so what’s the point? In the end, you’re only making her seem better by putting your insecurity on display.
  7. “Where are you?What are you doing?” Not only are you nagging your boyfriend, you’re also making it clear that you don’t trust him. You’re his girlfriend, not his babysitter. You don’t need to know every detail of his whereabouts. Give him some freedom and show him he’s in a trusting relationship with a secure woman.
  8. “Let me see your phone.” Unless you have an extremely open relationship, this is snooping in plain sight. You may play it off as wanting to see a picture, but everyone knows the real reason, including him. You’re snooping for even the slightest evidence that he;s unfaithful. A woman who’s secure, doesn’t need to snoop, because she knows the status of  her relationship already.
  9. “Do you love me?” If you’re asking this, he’s probably (hopefully) already said those three magic words. So why on earth are you asking when you already know the answer? How many times does he need to say it before you’ll believe him? He’ll only play along with this insecurity for so long before finding a woman that feels worthy of his love. 
  10. “Do you think I’m pretty?” You’re soliciting a compliment. Whether you ask this of your friend or your boyfriend, neither of them are going to say no. You’re just looking for validation and it looks needy.
  11. “Why didn’t you text me back?” If someone didn’t text you back, there was a perfectly good reason. Do you need to know it? No. Let it go. You don’t need someone to explain apologize for every little thing just so you can feel better.
  12. Insecurity is a big issue, but sadly, it’s a common one. The best thing you can do for yourself is to be aware of your insecurity. When you start showing yourself as a confident and secure woman, you’ll start feeling that way too.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.
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