Are You Dating A Boy Or A Man? 11 Ways To Tell The Difference

You’re an amazingly strong, independent, ambitious woman with a lot to offer a partner, but finding a guy who’s on your level is easier said than done. A lot of them seem great at first glance, but once you get to know them, you realize you’re basically dating a giant kid who can’t get his act together. Once you’re finally dating a grown man, however, you start to realize just how much better he is than the little boys in your past.

  1. A boy is immature and refuses to grow up; a man is killing adult life and making it look easy. A boy will make you feel like you’re back in high school again, and not in a good way. He’s lazy, childish and really doesn’t want to grow up. A man, however, takes adult life by the balls. He’s got a great job, a roof over his head and knows what he wants and where he’s going. God, it’s refreshing.
  2. A boy will laugh at you; a man will laugh with you. Boys tend to laugh at girls when they’re insecure with themselves and find poking fun and cruel teasing to be a sign of affection. Great, it’s middle school all over again. A man will never make you feel bad and laugh AT you — he’ll laugh WITH you because he’s on your level and you have the same sense of humor that doesn’t sacrifice silliness but definitely isn’t cruel.
  3. A boy asks you to pay because he’s broke; a man offers to take the check but won’t fight you on going dutch. There’s nothing wrong with paying for your guy, but a boy will most likely ask you to take care of things every time you go out because he doesn’t have a job or doesn’t know how to manage his money. Meanwhile, a man will either insist on picking up the tab (you can get the next one) or will agree to go dutch if it’s really important to you. He knows you can pay your own way, but he’s happy to do it for you — and without expecting anything in return.
  4. A boy is intimidated by you; a man is proud to be with such an incredible woman. Boys will either act out and treat you differently if they’re intimidated by you or they’ll keep their mouths shut. It’s one extreme to another. A man will be so proud to have someone as strong and independent as you that he’ll make you feel even more confident due to how thrilled he is to show you off to the world. It’s pretty great, to be honest.
  5. A boy is afraid of love; a man is willing to go the distance for it. A boy beats around the bush and refuses to talk about love because he’s scared. He may say he’s too young to settle down or avoid the topic altogether because he’s just not up for it. A man will tell you straight up that he loves you because he doesn’t want to waste any more time keeping it to himself. He wants to build a real future with you and he wants you to know it.
  6. A boy plays games; a man tells you what he wants. A boy will confuse the hell out of you and leave you questioning his motives and his intentions since he’s never straight up. Boys will play with your mind, your heart, and probably your self-confidence too. A man will be upfront. Whatever his intentions are, you’ll know it, and he’ll never try and keep you guessing about what he’s thinking. A man wants you to feel comfortable in knowing where things are going in the relationship.
  7. A boy runs away when things get hard; a man will always stay and fight. Boys can’t handle the maturity of a stable, communicative relationship because it requires a lot of hard work and feelings. They want to run away because they’re not prepared to put in real work. A man will always stay to make things better no matter how long it takes because he isn’t afraid of anything, except maybe losing you.
  8. A boy doesn’t know what he’s doing; a man has experience or is willing to learn. Only a boy would have no idea what to do or say when he’s around you. He comes off as lazy, uninterested and just plain dumb when it comes to relationships. A man will show you how he cares and make sure you feel it, both emotionally and physically. A man just knows what he’s doing, and if he doesn’t, he’s confident enough to take some pointers.
  9. A boy has low-self esteem; a man has attractive confidence. A boy lacks confidence in many areas when it comes to being a boyfriend. He doesn’t know what he’s doing and feels defensive about his flaws because he thinks they make him unworthy. A man has the utmost confidence when it comes to loving you and he sure as hell isn’t afraid to show it. A man knows he’s the one for you, and it’s hot as hell.
  10. A boy bad mouths others; a man keeps his mouth shut if he doesn’t have anything nice to say. Boys talk crap and say inappropriate things that they may think are funny but will always make your eyes roll. A man only opens his mouth when he has something nice to say and will talk highly of the people in his life rather than show envy and greed. A man will always be respectful to you and others.
  11. A boy likes you; a man loves you. A boy will obsess over how much he likes you and wants to be with you but will have a hard time showing his feelings. A man will love you with all his heart and prove every day why he’s worth it. When you date a man, you find out what you’ve been missing.
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia
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