Dating younger guys always seemed like a terrible idea… until I fell head over heels for a dude in his 20s. I certainly didn’t plan it; it seems like everything about this relationship was decided by a force much higher up than myself or him. Even though it’s the best relationship I’ve ever had or dared to dream about, sometimes I still have conflicting thoughts about the age difference.
- He says he wants serious things, but how can I be sure he’s ready? Everyone thinks they have it figured out in their 20s, but few actually do. I know from experience that I didn’t have life as figured out as I thought I did at 28; I’m much different now at 32, and I can’t help but wonder how he’ll change over the next four years. He seems ready for the things we’ve discussed, but time will be the true test.
- Sometimes he says something juvenile that reminds me of how young he is. I can’t help but notice when he says something that could only come out of the mouth of a 20-something. As I inwardly shake my head, I just remind myself that I was that young once too and all of the awkwardness I experienced in my 20s helped me shape the confident person I am in my 30s.
- I wonder what he’ll be like in five years. If I could get a sneak peek, that would be awesome. It’s unlikely that he’ll change majorly to the point where I wouldn’t want to be with him; I’m just curious. Some of the aspects of myself that changed in my 30s are the things I’m most proud of, and I hope he gains the same kind of confidence boost I did.
- What can I reasonably expect from him maturity-wise? It’s a real question, because I sometimes make the mistake of assuming he understands my perspective. In reality, we see the world differently sometimes and I have to remind myself that we’re in different places in life and there’s nothing wrong with that.
- Should I be doing something to help him? Should I just let him figure things out on his own like I did? Sometimes it’s hard to tell what I should do. While it may have helped me to have someone older advising me throughout my life, figuring things out for myself really helped me become stronger and I don’t want to rob anyone of that valuable experience.
- What if he ends up wanting someone younger down the road? I’m sure it’s a bit novel to date an older woman at this point in his life, but will he still feel that way when I’m a solid 40 and he’s only in his mid-30s? I’m not getting any younger, and that’s a little unnerving sometimes.
- I hope I’m not making a mistake. Deep down, I know that something would feel off if I were, but I still can’t help but wonder sometimes how our story will unfold from here. Will it be the magical journey I’m anticipating or something else entirely? Only time will tell.
- I have to know where this road goes. All fears aside, I have a good feeling about this relationship and I have to know what lies ahead. The future will always hold uncertainty, but I’ll walk down this road anyway because I think there’s something seriously worthwhile down there.
