Not everyone has a perfect relationship history. In fact, many women have trusted their hearts, only to have them be left badly bruised or broken. After such a betrayal, it’s natural that we shut ourselves off to the idea of love, at least for a while. No one wants to be single forever, but if you’re a guarded girl, dating is an especially scary place to navigate. However, it’d be much easier of guys understood where we’re coming from. Here’s what guys should know about dating the guarded girl:
- Her walls are fierce. If at first she comes across emotionless or cold, don’t assume the worst. It’s just that she needs more time to break down the barriers she’s worked hard to build. Letting her walls down is a brick-by-brick process. She needs to develop trust both within the relationship and within herself to let you in.
- She loved hard, and broke harder. This girl loved someone with all her heart, and it broke every piece of her when it didn’t work out. She had her heart destroyed, and when she finally built herself up again enough to get back into the world of dating, she resurfaced stronger. The walls are iron thick and she needs a real man to make her feel safe and confident enough to knock them down.
- She’ll act distant when she actually needs you the most. She’ll take a step back when she feels vulnerable, but that’s when she actually wants to hear terms of endearment the most. A little reassurance goes a long way with this girl. If you’re into her and want to keep building the relationship, tell her so she’s not lost within her own fear of being disappointed again.
- To her, love is a slow process. She’s the one who tip-toes her way to the edge of the diving board. She’s in no rush to jump head-first into feelings because she truly wants to feel confident and at complete ease before she does so. Don’t rush things with this girl, because it’ll freak her out. She wants someone who’s thoughtful but not overbearing, because slow and steady wins the race.
- The little things she does are signs she’s opening up. If she starts to show you she remembers the little things, like treating you to tickets your favorite band you mentioned or surprising you with your favorite beer, it means she’s starting to give in to her feelings and is less apprehensive in trusting you with them.
- She likes to listen. She genuinely enjoys learning everything she can about you because it paints the bigger picture for her and builds the trust she needs to feel to be open with you about who she is, too. Before she reveals the deepest parts of her, she needs to feel that you’re also comfortable with sharing your own.
- Her friends are protective. The closest people to her in her life know how she’s been hurt and don’t want to see it happen again, so don’t be surprised if they stand in close support when she starts dating you. They just want to make sure you have the best intentions so that this time when she lets herself fall, it’s for a great reason.
- When you crack the shell, she’ll give your relationship her all. Dating the guarded girl can seem like a challenge at first. You might think she’s beyond repair or that it’s not worth the added stress when it should seem so simple, but to her the simplicity lies within security, and once she gets to know you, she’ll open up unlike anyone else you’ve been with before.
