You swiped right on him and then he sent you a message. Intrigued, you opened it and saw simply, “hey.” That’s it — just three letters that are guaranteed to make you want to punch him in the face. Here are 12 reasons the best way to deal with such a message is to delete it — and him.
Come on — he has to make SOME effort. “Hey” is the laziest kind of message a guy can send and it only displays him as a lazy guy. If he’s starting with “hey,” he’ll probably end up texting “k” and “thx” during conversation or make like one of those losers on dating apps who leave halfway through a conversation and never return. Ugh.
He doesn’t care about first impressions. If first texts on a dating app were first-date outfits, the “hey” guy would be the loser who rocks up in a dirty old tracksuit. What he doesn’t understand is that you don’t get to size him up in real life because you’re chatting on your phones. He needs to give you a really great message to spark your interest, otherwise, why should you bother talking to him?
He’s riding on his looks. Okay, so his profile picture is really hot and honestly, it’s what made you swipe right on him, but does he think that he doesn’t have to work for your attention because he’ll get by on his pecs and smile? What a loser. Good looks don’t last THAT long — they need to be backed up by a really amazing personality. That’s where the first text comes in.
It makes bad pick-up lines look better. When a guy dishes you a really lame pick-up line in the club that makes you want to throw your wine all over him, at least he’s trying something. God, that’s how bad “hey” is — it makes us nostalgic for cheesy “did you fall out of heaven?” lines.
You end up doing all the work. If he’s only texting you “hey” as a way of introducing himself, then you’re the one who has to make the effort. You’ll have to ask him a real question or try to start an interesting conversation. Basically, you’re the one holding this whole thing together and he’s just coasting for as long as he feels like it. It seriously sucks.
It’s disheartening. When a guy texts “hey,” he’s really saying, “I didn’t bother looking through your profile to find something interesting which we could talk about.” Gee, thanks. He’s really just the guy who saw a pretty woman and thought she could easily be reached with one lame word.
He treats all women the same. It also sucks because it means he probably sends out this message to loads of women on the dating app. It’s a generic message that he doesn’t put any thought into. He doesn’t sit and actually think of a unique message for a unique woman. It’s all just the same crap in the hope that one of the women will be interested in chatting (probably based on his shirtless pics).
He’s on lots of dating apps. He’s so “busy” on loads of dating apps that he’s losing count of all the women he’s chatting to. It’s way too time-consuming to send out personalized messages on different dating platforms, so he resorts to the lame “hey.” But honestly, he should take that “hey” somewhere else.
He wants an ego boost. He might just be texting you a lame message because he’s on this dating app for numbers. He wants to put minimal effort and see how many women respond to him. It’s not about dating at all, it’s just about seeing if he’ll get an ego boost from the experience. Thanks for wasting our time, a**hole.
He’s not committed to this. Or dating in general, clearly. Come on, dating is a landmine and roller-coaster in one. It’s tough out there and you need to play your best game, especially when you only have a photo and message to go on instead of body language clues, a voice, and so on that you get in real life. If he can’t even show commitment to having a real conversation with you, what hope is there that this guy will be a gem in real life? Not much.
He wants a booty call. Much like the guy who texts you “hey” after not speaking to you for weeks (ghosters suck), the guy who sends “hey” on a dating app is probably just looking to score. He can ditch building a real connection and the “getting to know each other” phase by trying his luck at getting sex instead. What a jerk.
He doesn’t stand out in the crowd, so he doesn’t deserve to stand beside you. You deserve a guy who cares about making a great first impression and wants to have a real conversation with you. He should do this by being funny/witty/intelligent/interested — whatever’s unique to him so that his message stands out in a mass of “hey” texts. You deserve more than the “hey” guy who just wastes your time and expensive data.
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