I Know What I Want From A Relationship — If We’re Not On The Same Page, I’m Out

It gets pretty frustrating wasting my time with guys who are never really on the same page with me when it comes to what they want in a relationship. I’m a grown woman who knows what I want and what I’m ready for — real and lasting love — and I won’t accept anything less. If you don’t feel the same or you aren’t quite sure, I’m out.

My time is valuable and I’m done wasting it. I’ve been the girl who bites my tongue when it comes to talking about where things are going to avoid scaring a guy off. I’ve been in more almost relationships than I’ve ever wanted to be in because of that and I’m over it. Now I’m very vocal about what I’m looking for and I don’t hesitate to say that it’s a real relationship with a solid future. If you can’t handle my intentions or if my honesty scares you, then it’s clear that you’re not the guy for me.

I’ve worked hard to learn my lessons so I can avoid making the same mistakes twice. My past relationships taught me who I am and what I want for the long haul, and I’d never trade those experiences back for anything because they made me who I am today. I won’t back peddle on what I’ve learned by accepting blurred lines or delayed timelines on putting labels on things when I know I’m ready. You either want to date me seriously or you won’t date me at all. There’s no in between with me.

I’m girlfriend material and I won’t settle for less than a boyfriend. I know that I’ll make a great girlfriend to the guy who’s ready to build a real relationship together. I actually want to be that girl beside you who helps you with the Saturday chores, surprises you with your favorite home-cooked meal and supports you even in the darkest hours. Why would I settle for being only halfway in, keeping things low key when I’m capable of so much more? It just doesn’t make sense and I refuse to live in any state that only channels a fraction of my true potential.

I’m ready to start building a life with someone. I want to make plans and start building the future with someone who sees me in theirs. I want to shop for furniture together and decorate a home eventually that we’ll choose as a team. It might seem scary to some guys, but I’m not looking for just any guy, I’m looking for the guy who wants to start working towards building something meaningful instead of just floating from girl to girl like an immature jerk.

I’m done with the stomach flip that comes with dating these days. There’s nothing fun about waiting for a text back that never comes or dealing with the nauseating feeling of knowing I want to be official with someone who’s trying hard to keep it unofficial. I made the decision that I’m no longer going to allow myself to be put in those terrible situations anymore. If it’s something you’re not ready for, then stop wasting my time and let me work towards the guy who isn’t confused about what he wants from love.

I’ve paid my dues and I’ve earned what I’m searching for. You could have genuinely good intentions with me, but if you’re not willing to be in an actual relationship with the labels it comes with and the mentality necessary to grow into something even deeper, then I won’t stick around and try and convince you. I’ve been there and done that, paid my dues and I’ve survived plenty of heartaches before you showed up. Love isn’t a game to me and I’m done pretending it is just to make the guy in my company feel more at ease.

The answer should be simple, so don’t make it complicated. It really should be sound and simple logic — you either like me in a real way or I’m just a time-filler until something better comes along. I don’t care if you say you’re “not ready” or are “too busy.” To me, it all equates to the same thing — you don’t care about me the way I need you to. Instead of dragging things out and leading me on just to experience some temporary enjoyment, let me know the truth so I can spare myself the trouble.

I’m a grown woman and I plan on acting like it. At a certain point, you should have this figured out or at least have some idea of what it is you’re looking for. I’m not a kid anymore and this isn’t high school. I’m a grown adult woman who has my sh*t together and I know that I want a true partner in life. It’s cool if you don’t, but let me know instead of leading me on and building my hopes higher and higher with each day that goes by. I’d rather be alone than with someone who isn’t on the same page as me when it comes to love.

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