This Is How You Know You’re ACTUALLY Over Him

When your relationship ended you were crushed, hurt, and really pissed off. You refused to accept that it was really over. Instead, you poured your heart out in lengthy text messages (that he rarely responded to), stalked his social media activity, and constantly told yourself that one day he’d wake up and realize his mistake. But time has passed, new relationships have formed, and you find yourself thinking less and less about your beloved ex. Could it be you’re actually over him?

  1. You’re Dating Because You Want To. When you two first broke up, you were determined to get him back. “What better way to do that than by making him jealous?” you thought. So, you started hanging out with other guys — lots of other guys — in the hope that he would find out and confess his dying love for you. That never happened, but you don’t care. Now, you date because you want to, not because you think it’ll make your ex jealous.
  2. You No Longer Drunk Text Him. Finally, you can go out with your friends, drink, and not wake up regretting the twenty “I miss you” texts you sent your ex the previous night. In fact, you don’t even think about your ex when you’re drinking anymore — you’re too focused on having a good time with your friends. Success!
  3. He Looks Less Attractive Now. You don’t follow your ex on social media, but that doesn’t stop him from popping up randomly. (Having mutual friends can really suck.) Whenever you see a pic of him, you’re low-key shocked by his appearance. For whatever reason, he looks different to you now… in a bad kind of way. It’s because you’re no longer projecting what you loved about him onto his appearance. Now he’s just a basic guy.
  4. You Rarely Think About Him Sexually. You used think about him all the time — his body, his eyes, the way his thing-a-ling felt inside of you. You used to long for him, but not anymore. Now, you only remember the awkward times you two shared in bed.
  5. You Don’t Compare Other Guys To Him. You used to always see similarities between your ex and the guys you dated. Either they looked like your ex, talked like your ex, or wore the same clothes as your ex. You don’t see those similarities anymore — at least, not as much as you used to. You see guys for who they are as individuals, and you don’t compare them to your used-to-be boyfriend.
  6. His Success Doesn’t Make You Cry. When you heard that he graduated, got a new job, and bought a new house, you weren’t unhappy. Just the opposite: you were happy for him. Well, maybe not happy, but you weren’t upset or angry that his life was going well. His fortune doesn’t make you want to break down in uncontrollable sobs anymore; you’re okay that he’s okay.
  7. You Can See Him In Public. You don’t feel the need to make plans to see your ex. However, you can handle running into him. You would never do it on purpose, but accidents happen. Seeing him face-to-face is something you can deal with now without crying, screaming in his face, or begging him to take you back.
  8. You Don’t Hate Him Anymore. If you still hate your ex, that’s a sign you’re definitely not over him. But if you’re pretty neutral, that means you’ve moved on! You should be able to look back on your relationship and smile at the good times without feeling like you want to straight-up kill him. If you can finally admit, “He wasn’t all evil, he made me happy sometimes,” then congrats — you’re over him!
  9. His New Girlfriend Doesn’t Faze You. Before, the idea of him having a new girl would’ve made you sick to your stomach. Now, it doesn’t really bother you. You don’t scroll through his GF’s Instagram with your friends and judge everything about her. Why? Because his life doesn’t feel like your business. After all, it really isn’t!
  10. You’ve Had An Epiphany. You’ve finally realized that your friends were right when they said, “You can do better than him.” You really do believe it was his loss and that you’ll eventually (if you haven’t already) find someone who’s a better fit. It’s not that you need someone better than your ex — you need someone different!
  11. You Don’t Respond To His Texts. The dude finally came to his senses and texted you. He told you how much he loved you and how he’d do anything to get back into your good graces. Instead of entertaining his BS, you didn’t respond. Or better yet, you just said, “No.”
Jordan White is a writer based in Scottsdale, Arizona with more than 8 years of experience. She graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in Rhetoric and Creative Writing in 2015 and while there, she wrote for The Daily Wildcat. She has since written for sites including FanBread, and, of course, Bolde. You can find about more her on Facebook. She has a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about and despises the heat more than anything.
close-link
close-link
close-link
close-link