You’re Not Alone — Most Single People Are Dealing With These 12 Things

It’s easy to feel sorry for yourself when you feel like you’ve been through the dating wringer. You swear that you’ve seen and heard it all when it comes to horrible dating experiences. You must be the only person that has it this bad, right? Wrong. If you’ve dealt with these 12 things in your dating life, you’re not unlucky in love — you’re totally normal:

  1. Being ghosted. You probably know that you’re not the only person who has ever been ghosted, even if it feels like that sometimes. Your BFFs have been ghosted a lot too, and it’s definitely something that you guys talk about. That doesn’t make it any easier, of course, but it’s definitely not a rare occurrence.
  2. Having terrible date after terrible date. You may feel like The Queen Of Bad Dates, and yet, this is a common part of searching for love. Going on a lot of dates means going on good, bad, and average ones. There’s no way to change that — and yes, it happens to everyone.
  3. Relationships that never even happen. If you keep finding yourself in almost relationships, that’s not your fault. It’s not something that you deserve sympathy about, either. It’s just what happens when you’re dating these days. Sure, you can tell yourself that you know how to spot a commitment-phobe from a mile away or that you’ll bail at the first sign of sketchiness, but sometimes you find yourself with an almost boyfriend and you’re not even sure how you got there.
  4. Losing all hope for the future. Walking around like you’re living in a rom-com fantasy is pretty unheard of when you’re single. It’s more likely that you don’t have much hope that you’re ever going to meet someone who’s right for you. This may be a really miserable way to live, but it at least makes you a normal single AF girl.
  5. Being so over online dating. Feel like screaming every time you look at your OKCupid profile or swipe left and right on Tinder? You’re not the only one. If you’re totally over online dating and can’t even with another conversation that leads nowhere, you’re more normal than you even think. In fact, if you had luck with online dating, you would be the weird one.
  6. Feeling alone in a sea of couples. You may hate going to parties and realizing that you’re the only person without a plus one. You might stay silent during girls’ night out because your BFFs won’t stop gushing about their boyfriends and you have no BF to speak off. Being the final single girl is not something that you need pity over. There are a lot of people in your situation, so you might as well stop making such a big deal out of it.
  7. Wondering if something’s wrong with you. You are definitely not the only single person to wonder if you’re doing something wrong with this whole dating thing. Sometimes you think that if you could just talk differently or act another way, your dates would go much better and you might even find a boyfriend sometime soon. This is totally normal, and yet you should definitely get a grip (but you already knew that).
  8. Meeting guys who are terrified of commitment. It’s the most common story in the world: girl meets boy, boy is never going to be her boyfriend, and yet she tries her best to make that happen. This is completely out of your control, and it’s no reason to feel bad. It literally just happens… until you meet the right guy and it’s a thing of the past.
  9. Chatting with guys who never want to meet you. Oh, so you talk to guys online who seem nice enough and funny enough but totally disappear when you bring up the concept of meeting IRL? No way. This is the most normal thing ever, and it’s really not something to worry about.
  10. Overthinking anything you possibly can. You may think that you have the worst love life ever because you can’t stop thinking and worrying about whatever is going on. You feel like your BFF never stares at a text message for an hour trying to decode it or freaks out about every little thing. The truth is that overthinking is just a part of dating, especially when you’ve been single for so long that you can’t remember when you last met a good guy. It’s not your bad luck, it’s just what happens.
  11. Having a new relationship not go according to plan. It’s no secret that you have to go with the flow when you first start dating someone new, and yet, that’s a really hard thing to do. You have so many high expectations, and you want things to move forward as soon as possible. But when there are some bumps along the road, you’re not actually unlucky in love; you’re just dealing with reality.
  12. Going through a major dry spell. Whether you can’t remember the last time you slept with someone or you’ve gone through two months without any dates at all, you feel like the most unlucky person in the world when you experience a dry spell. But that’s just part of being single, and it’s nothing to feel bad about. You’re way too awesome to worry about any of this stuff.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.
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