The Scary Process Of Falling In Love When You’ve Been Single For A Long Time

No matter how strong and independent a woman is in her life, when she finally meets a great guy and begins to fall for him, her life becomes filled with emotions she’s not used to. When you’ve been single for a long time and suddenly there’s this other person in your life that’s truly amazing, adjusting to the new dynamic is a challenge. That’s why, when you’re going through the sometimes scary (but always exciting!) process of falling in love, you’re likely to go experience the following.

  1. You worry about your freedom. You knew it would happen eventually, but there’s no way to truly prepare for welcoming a new person into the spaces in your life that you’ve learned to fill yourself because you had to. You struggle with wanting to keep your priorities in line while also finding the time to fit someone new into your world. You know you might need to make reasonable sacrifices, but with no guarantees of a happy ending, it’s a scary wager to make.
  2. You obsess over the details. Everything becomes a “what does this mean?” scenario because it’s been so long since you’ve known feelings this real. When you start to feel real emotions for someone, you can’t help but feel apprehensive and a bit on edge because you really don’t want to screw it up. You’re not even sure if you’re good at relationships anymore, so you worry about all the minor details along the way and just hope you can keep your act together.
  3. You struggle with finding balance. You’ve been alone for so long that spending huge chunks of time with the guy you’re falling for is a scary adventure. You wonder if you’re really, truly ready for this… even if you’ve been searching and saying you’re ready for a really long time before.
  4. You’re scared of getting hurt. While everyone is scared of being hurt, being single long-term and then suddenly entering relationship territory and feeling real feelings comes with a new level of fear. No wonder falling in love is so scary. What if you leave your comfort zone only to be left shattered into a million pieces? You know we need to jump eventually, but you’re hesitant.
  5. You feel exposed and vulnerable. Real and genuine feelings have become so foreign in your time alone. Sure, you’ve had crushes, and sure, you’ve liked people in the meantime, but when your heart starts to sink deeper into your chest, the feeling takes your breath away and you feel naked to your personal sense of security. They can hurt you. You’re in a place where you can be hurt again, and even though you want to try, it’s a scary process allowing that emotion to push its way through.
  6. But eventually, you regain control. Soon enough, you realize that you have to take the risk because you’ve been hoping for so long that someone so great would finally cross your path. When it finally does, apprehension and a wave of fear may temporarily occupy you, but eventually, you get back into the driver’s seat and put your foot on the gas pedal.
  7. When you finally fall, it’s for real. There’s no going back. When you finally let go, it’s the real deal. You’ve spent the time alone. You’ve had enough time in between from your last love and you’re ready to let yourself fall for a new one. One that will hopefully be better, though you know it might not be. But you’re willing to try, even though it’s scary.
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