If You Want To Move In With Me, We Need Two Bathrooms

While the thought of living with my guy under the same roof sounds like relationship goals, it also makes me feel a little uneasy to think that I’d have to change my routines to accommodate him. The truth is that I like having my own space, especially in the bathroom. I’ve decided that a two bathroom minimum is the only way I’ll even think about moving in together. Here’s why:

1. I have a lot of stuff. I’m a product junkie. I have creams, lotions, milks, butters and oils for days. All of those things need space in my cabinets and I barely have enough space now. Plus, I like to add candles, incense, pictures and little trinkets in my bathroom to liven up the space. I just really like a zen bathroom, it makes me feel calm and content. I don’t want to forgo that just because I move in with my man.
2. Personal space is essential to my happiness. I’m independent AF and I need my space. It’s basically the reason I’ve opted out of having a roommate for so long. I like to know that when I come home in the evening, I can kick off my shoes, go pantsless and veg out in my personal space without having to answer to anyone. It’s comforting and it makes me happy. The fact is that moving in with my guy means that I’ll have to give up a little bit of my personal space. The way I see it, two bathrooms allows me to maintain a little independence.
3. Two bathrooms minimize morning stress. As it is, I hardly make it out on time in the morning with one bathroom. Adding another person who also needs to get out of the house before 8 a.m. every day sounds like a nightmare. If we both have our own bathroom then we can get ready for work in peace without rushing to get out of the shower because one person needs to use the toilet.
4. Having two bathrooms likely means a bigger apartment. If you haven’t noticed by now, I really like my personal space. A place with a least two bathrooms automatically means our apartment is going to be much bigger than an apartment with one. It also might mean we have two bedrooms instead of one or a bigger living room or kitchen. Ultimately, a bigger apartment means that we won’t feel like we are living on top of each other.
5. Two bathrooms are easier to clean. Okay, let me explain. When two people are using the same bathroom, the accumulation of dirt, grime, and general nastiness builds up much more quickly and requires very frequent attention. On the other hand, if we’re using two separate bathrooms, the build up of grime isn’t as quick and gives you a few more days between cleanings. I’m all about making my life easier.
6. I’m trying to keep it sexy. Bodily fluids and functions are a fact of life, I get that, but I don’t want my guy to see me as one of his fraternity brothers who he can brush his teeth next to while I’m peeing. It’s just too comfortable for my taste. He can handle his bodily functions in his bathroom and me in mine. It’s that simple.
7. Men are kind of gross. For example, I love a good beard on my guy but having it means maintaining that beard, which means hair is likely to be all over the sink even if he’s the cleanest in the world. Nail clippings, hair, bodily fluids and the pungent smell of male body wash is all something that will kill my zen bathroom vibe.
8. I don’t think it’s that crazy of a request. We both work hard, have pretty good jobs and can afford the extra square footage. Why cramp into a smaller place with one bathroom when we can be happier and less stressed out with two?
9. Two bathrooms will minimize fights. Fights are inevitable when you live with someone and they’re often about things that are totally avoidable. Being able to have my own space will decrease my stress levels and mean I’m way less likely to nag him about leaving his boxers on the floor or peeing on the toilet seat. Ugh.
10. If he knows what’s best for him, he’ll do this.  Relationships are about comprise, right? If that’s true, this is something that I need him to compromise on for me. Everyone has their little idiosyncrasies and this is mine, even if it is a little high maintenance. In return, I’ll do my part and make sure that he gets what he needs too. I think that’s fair.