There’s a stereotype around guys who are blessed below the waist. Generally, the archetype is that other men envy them and women want to be with them, but let’s just air this out right now: being with a guy who has a generous manhood has its complications and drawbacks too. Here are 12 things you need to know about dating a guy who has a lot to offer:
- You have to be careful how you react when you see it for the first time. Man parts are a sensitive topic with men across the board, but you wouldn’t think that would be the case with guys on the larger end of that spectrum. Think about it—handling a larger size isn’t fun or appealing for a lot of women. These men may have been rebuffed or dumped in the past because women don’t prefer their particular brand of intimacy, and that can probably create some self-esteem issues. Just don’t act like you’re horrified or teasing him when he whips it out—although that should be a rule in general, no matter their size.
- On the other hand, he may be a little full of himself. Naturally, this is going to differ person to person, but guys who are well-endowed can sometimes be, for lack of better word, a little egotistical. Larger packages are idolized by all genders alike in our society, so having that reputation may have done a number on his ego. Keep an eye out for any you’re-so-blessed-to-be-near-me nonsense unless you’re into that kind of ‘tude.
- Don’t get started until you’re definitely turned on. While this should be a blanket statement for sex with anyone, it’s very important here. Engaging in thorough pre-love-making activity (if that’s what you need to get going) is crucial for comfortable—nay, bearable—intimacy with a big dude. When we get aroused, natural slipperiness occurs and your lady parts’ walls will stretch more easily, two things that are very important for this kind of romp.
- Go slow, especially when you’re starting. Everyone knows that those first moments can be the least comfortable, and that is extra true for your bigger guy. Your lady parts’ walls can stretch quite a bit, but easing into the act will make this expanding more gradual and therefore easier to cope with.
- Don’t hesitate to communicate during the deed. This should go for all intimacy, always, but it goes double when you could be in pain or discomfort. Make sure to tell them when something isn’t working or when something is working, maybe even consider coming up with a safe word. Bigger guys can feel a little overwhelming in the bedroom, but remember, you’re partly in control. Working with him to find the ideal techniques for both of you will result in some of the best love-making of your life.
- Use outside help, for the love of God. If there’s one thing I cannot stand, it’s KY shamers. I prefer using outside help no matter the size of the man I’m with, and that goes double when he’s on the large side. People who look at this as something young women “shouldn’t need” are straight-up fooling themselves and I feel sorry for their intimate lives. When it comes to your bigger man, don’t be embarrassed to load up on the KY and to keep reapply throughout your romp. Trust, it’s going to make entry and the entire process a lot more enjoyable for you.
- Don’t go all the way in. Larger men are going to have a harder time going all the way in, but that’s OK. Truthfully, you’ll avoid additional tearing if he doesn’t. This is going to take a few tries to find a depth that works for both of you, but it will be well-worth the experimenting.
- Figure out the best positions for his size. There are going to be positions that elevate love-making with a bigger man, just like there are positions that elevate it with men that have smaller man parts. A good one for larger gentlemen is standing doggy. To pull it off, stand up and face the same direction as your guy. Have him enter you from behind, with you pushing against the wall or a piece of furniture for leverage. Try lifting a leg for easier access.
- Girl-on-top is a recommended go-to. In general, a great way to get pleasure with manageably shallow penetration is girl-on-top positions. Moves like reverse cowgirl should go over well with your guy.
- Be prepared to heal tearing to your lady parts. When your guy is bigger, he will stretch your lady parts and often tear the walls, no matter how prepared you were during the act. This isn’t the end of the world, but you want to keep your bits clean, untouched, and only wash the area with water to assure no infections occur.
- Love-making may have to be sporadic. Since tears are probably a frequent occurrence with your bigger dude, the actual activity might have to be a little less frequent to let your tears heal. Essentially, just try doing it a few times a week rather than every day. We know how hard it’ll be but just try, for the sake of your downstairs.
- Don’t be afraid to take control of the big situation. It sounds a little harsh, but maybe making love with this bigger man isn’t for you. If the intimacy feels constantly like work or is always very painful, maybe it’s time to break things off. Now, if this guy is your committed boyfriend and you have an emotional connection to him, I wouldn’t suggest breaking up JUST because of his painful manhood. Try other ways to pleasure each other, like toys or using your mouth more. But if you’re just messing around with this guy and you don’t see it going anywhere real, don’t be ashamed to break things off if the intimacy isn’t enjoyable.