It’s normal to worry about things from time to time, but constantly feeling anxious (especially about things that probably aren’t even going to happen) can stop you from living in the moment and make it hard to actually enjoy your life. Are you guilty of this? Here’s how you know.
- You spend a good chunk of time worrying about the what ifs. You spend hours (and text your friends constantly about) what might happen in the future to the point that you don’t appreciate the present moment at all. You might even know that the scenarios you’re freaking out about are super unlikely but can’t stop replaying them over and over in your mind. There are so many possible what ifs to most situations, but most of them will never happen, which is why it’s unnecessary—and detrimental to enjoying your life—to worry about them.
- You overanalyze situations and their possible outcomes too much, causing you to avoid them altogether. You miss out on dates and fun events because you’re too worried about what might happen or how they might end. You’d rather not go to things like this than deal with the anxiety and stress that they bring you, and that’s a shame. Think of everything you’re missing out on!
- Your friends don’t invite you to hang out with them as often, most likely because they’re sick of listening to you worry about what might end up happening. Even friends who love you unconditionally get sick of being around you when you spend the entire time talking about possible (but unlikely) scenarios. Have your friends been telling you to chill out or asking you if you’re okay a lot lately? Then worrying too much is probably taking a toll on your life. Worrying can be compulsive, and once you start, it can be impossible to start—or to talk about anything else. Sometimes, you need to just take a deep breath and realize you can’t control everything, no matter how much you try to or plan for it.
- You’re overly prepared for every and any possible outcome, no matter how unlikely (or even impossible) it may be. Sure, it’s good to be prepared in case a situation doesn’t go according to plan, but most often, the time you spend worrying about the future is just wasted time. No matter how much you worry, whatever’s going to happen will happen anyway and you’ll have to deal with it then. Might as well not waste today worrying about what might happen tomorrow.
- You replay conversations and events over and over in your mind. You might even find yourself losing sleep or skipping meals because it’s distracting you that much. Instead of letting things go, you obsess over how you could have reacted better, what you could have said, or what you could have done differently. You miss out on today worrying about yesterday, which is already over and can’t be changed.
- You re-read texts and emails multiple times, making sure you didn’t miss any details or important information. You’re also constantly refreshing your email and checking your phone, just in case there are any updates or changes to the plan. You’re always nervous that you’re missing something or read something wrong, so you have to quadruple check, just in case. You can’t be present with your friends or family without your phone or laptop, which makes it seem like you don’t care when the reality is that you care too much and are extremely anxious.
- You don’t know what “relaxing” means. Any free time you have, you worry about wasting it if you’re not doing something productive (or planning for something productive in the future). You can’t remember the last time you just hung out, watched a movie or read a good book purely for enjoyment. If relaxing is something people regularly do, you wouldn’t know, because it’s basically impossible for you. You’re basically the definition of stressed out.
- You have a nervous habit like biting your nails or twirling your hair. And you feel like you’re always doing it, to the point that you barely even notice it anymore. People point out that you’re constantly biting your nails or tapping your fingers or clicking your pen, and you hadn’t even realized you’d been doing it at all.
- You worry about how much time you spend worrying. Not only do you constantly worry about the past and the future, you also realize that you spend too much time doing so, and worry about how much you worry. Although you’re aware that the time you spend worrying is far too much, it feels impossible to worry less or stop altogether. You get anxiety thinking about the time you’re spending worrying, but yet you can’t seem to do anything else.
