What’s he doing down there? Should I moan? Should I just fake it? Sadly, we accept bad oral sex far too often. We give excuses — “At least he tried” or “I guess it’s better than nothing.” Enough! It’s time to get better oral. You deserve it.
It’s a little tricky, though. You can always tell when he’s just half-assing it to get to the main event. But we need foreplay. If he’s trying but failing miserably, help him out. Don’t criticize him or murder his ego. You want him to get better, not give up completely. Trust me, a little and understanding effort on your part leads to far better oral sex later.
Give him some subtle moans. You can’t expect him to know if you like something or not if you don’t let him know what’s working. Moan when he hits a good spot and stay quiet when it’s just not doing it for you. Do this and he’ll figure it out quickly.
Move your body to that perfect spot. Need his tongue a little higher or maybe a tad to the left? Just because his head’s between your legs doesn’t mean you can’t move. Raise those hips, scoot to the side. He’ll appreciate the help and you don’t have to say a word.
Give him some sexy direction. Guys love it when you start talking dirty. Use your dirty talk to give him some direction. Breathlessly tell him to go faster or encourage him when he’s hitting the right spot by saying, “Yes, right there, that feels so good.” If you’re using a sexy voice and make it sound like you just can’t hold back, he won’t even realize he’s getting valuable instructions.
Tell him what you need. Sometimes you just have to tell him. You moved, but he kept doing the same thing in the same spot. Tell him where to lick and touch. Once again, try to use a sexy voice. The more demanding or condescending you sound, the less likely he is to pay attention.
Talk about it beforehand. OK, so he didn’t do so well last time. Get better oral this time by talking about it before either one of you are even in the mood. Be gentle. Tell him what you like. Tell him it felt good his way, but you’d get off even better your way. Once he hears you screaming his name, he’ll love doing things your way.
Know what you actually like. It’s a little hard to give a guy instructions if you don’t even know what you like. Yes, a tongue feels different, but you know what kind of pressure and speed you like just by touching yourself. Spend some time exploring yourself. Not only do you get extra orgasms, but you’ll know what to tell him next time.
Give him a little stimulation. Is his performance lacking enthusiasm? Give him some visual stimulation. Run your hands over your body while he’s working down stairs. Seeing you all worked up gives him some much needed motivation.
Don’t let him stop short. Not there yet? Let him know. Some guys give a few quick licks and think you’re finished. It’s one thing if he honestly can’t stand giving oral. It’s another if he’s just being lazy and selfish. Most important, NEVER fake it. If you fake it, he’ll always stop before you even get started.
Guide his tongue to your clitoris. Guys hone in on the vagina. After all, it’s the ultimate goal. Yet, oral on the vagina alone may not be enough. Move your body so his tongue hits the sweet spot. Make sure you’re moaning load enough for him to hear when he does reach your clitoris.
Encourage hand/tongue coordination. Oral doesn’t have to be a tongue only sport. Encourage him to use his hands, too. Stroking while licking is even more effective at getting you off. Besides, if his tongue does get tired, he can take a brief break while still stimulating you. You get great oral and he doesn’t end up with a numb tongue.
Give him a hand. Don’t be afraid to slide your hands downstairs to help out. He’ll follow where you’re touching and you’ll get exactly what you want. He’ll think you’re so in the moment that you couldn’t help touching yourself. He doesn’t have to know you were just helping him out.
Ask him to try something new. Most guys don’t mind trying something new in the bedroom. Mention a technique you’re curious about. It could be something as simple as circling your clitoris with his tongue. He’ll just be eager to try something new. In the end, you just get better oral.