You know, I’ve always wanted to be one of those carefree girls who can hook up and leave without a problem. I’d love it to be easy breezy, except that it’s not in the least bit for me. It costs me immense amounts of emotional currency and I just can’t go there.
- I’m not a hookup kind of girl. At this point in my life, hookups are not in my repertoire. They just aren’t something that I’m OK with for myself so I don’t do them. This may change someday but for right now, I can’t see myself ever only hooking up with someone. It just doesn’t align with what I want or need for myself.
- It’s not a moral issue, just preference. Just because I don’t do hookups doesn’t mean that it’s automatically wrong. I don’t judge women that do just hook up with people, that’s their prerogative. It’s not about morality, it’s simply about preference and my preference is to not hook up with anyone. Someone else’s preference is going to be different than mine and that’s OK.
- Hooking up with someone causes me a lot of pain. I’ve tried many times to hook up with people, but I always end up getting hurt. It hurts me that I’ve given my body away so easily and it hurts that I’m not pursuing more with the person that I slept with. For this reason, it’d be absolutely crazy for me to try and hook up with someone. I already know what the result would be: pain, pain, and more pain.
- I’ve tried and it didn’t work out so many times. I’ve tried to hook up with people over and over again. I wanted so badly to be the kind of girl who could just hook up. I realized, though, that I was giving away a piece of my soul each time. Further, I was putting myself in danger when sleeping with strangers. In doing so I was more vulnerable to being assaulted. There are many reasons that just hooking up didn’t work for me, but this was a biggie.
- I don’t care how hot you think I am. I’ve had guys be like, “But you’re so hot,” as if their pathetic groveling was going to change my mind. It wasn’t. I know that I’m an attractive person, but that doesn’t automatically mean that you get to hook up with me. These guys must watch way too many Hollywood movies if they really think they’re entitled to sex. So, thanks for the compliment, but I’m all set.
- I’m not a piece of meat. When a guy objectifies me like that, it just makes me sick. When they assume that I only want to hookup, I don’t want anything more. It feels as if they’re just seeing me as a slab of meat instead of the human being that I am. Newsflash: I’m not a piece of meat. I am a gal who has her own desires, hopes, and dreams. Just like your mom, sister, or female friends. Please treat me that way.
- You’re not going to get me to change my mind. I can’t tell you how many guys I’ve had try to change what I said I wanted. They hear me say that I’m not going to just hook up with them, but they try to go for it anyways. At the end of the day, I’m not going to change my mind for you. My choice isn’t dependent on a person, it’s dependent on what I feel is best for me. That isn’t getting persuaded!
- I’m looking for a relationship. I’m not looking for a hookup, I’m looking for a relationship. I’m seeking someone who’s cool with waiting until we know each other to sleep with one another. This means that I won’t settle for anything less or different than what I’m searching for.
- Please be straightforward. It’s fine that you want a hookup and I don’t, but please don’t lie to me just to get into my pants. Although I don’t sleep with people right away anyways, it’d be better to just not waste either one of our time. Just be clear about what you’re looking for and I’ll do the same. This way, you’ll find a girl who’s actually looking to just hook up, too.
- There are girls who enjoy it. Just as there are girls who aren’t into hooking up at all, there are plenty of girls who are. I regularly see on Tinder girls looking to hook up. All the power to these chicks. If it’s working for them, I’m glad. They can be the other half of a mutually agreed upon exchange.
