If you’re a big fan of condiments, chances are ranch is one of your favorite flavors. At once tangy and sweet with a bit of a sharpness to it, it’s great with everything from salads to chicken tenders and potato chips. If you’re like me and can’t get enough of the stuff, prepare yourself for the knowledge that you can now buy a full keg of Hidden Valley Ranch to keep you sated for a long time.
Buy me a keg of ranch so I know it’s real. pic.twitter.com/T6m8oVQ89k
— Nathan Henderson (@Hendo_121) November 7, 2017
Technically speaking, it’s supposed to last you a year. The keg, which retails for $65, holds five liters of Hidden Valley Ranch or about seven regular-sized bottles. However, the purchase does include a year’s worth of ranch, though how many bottles that amounts to doesn’t seem clear (and would obviously depend on how much you love ranch).
They’re stackable and small, so you could always buy more than one. Can you imagine anything better than lining your kitchen with kegs full of ranch? I can’t. Hidden Valley’s kegs measure roughly 10 inches high and about 6 inches wide, plus they’re meant to be stacked. I think you know what you need to do.
Ranch can also come in fountain form if that’s your thing. The holidays may be over, but that doesn’t mean your next gathering couldn’t do with a Hidden Valley Ranch fountain. What’s weird is that the fountain holds about half as much ranch as the keg but costs twice as much at $110. That being said, it will create a pretty spectacular sight, so maybe you’re paying for the aesthetic. The fountain even comes with a little skirt as if it was a Christmas tree!
Bottom line: ranch rules. Regardless of what form it comes in, I think we can all agree that Hidden Valley Ranch is one of the best things that was ever invented. While not everyone understands the allure, it’s clear those people aren’t very smart and don’t know what’s good for them. I’m talking about ranch, of course.
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