You know when you’re so over-the-top attracted to someone that you literally feel like your vagina has a heartbeat? You turn into a 110% horndog and just want to rip each other’s clothes off and get down and dirty for the rest of your life? That’s what I’m looking for with the guys I date. If he’s not making me go crazy with sexual desire, sorry, but I’m not interested.
Sexual chemistry is a must-have. It shouldn’t be revolutionary or shocking for a woman to say this in 2022. Sex is not all for a man’s pleasure and I want to know that the guy I’m dating is going to get me off (and not stop until it happens). I’m not looking for a guy friend — I’m looking for a boyfriend, and the difference between the two is what goes on in the bedroom. Therefore, without that pulsing feeling down below,
I can’t be with someone whose clothes I don’t want to rip off. I’m not interested in some sweet guy bringing me flowers or making me breakfast in bed. That’s nice and all, but it means nothing if we’re not going at it like jackrabbits at night. I legitimately can’t think of anything more depressing than being with a “nice” boyfriend that I have no desire to sleep with. That’s not the vibe, and I won’t be participating in it.
Sexual attraction is about more than just appearance. I should clarify here that I’ve had conventionally unattractive guys give me that heartbeat in my vagina that I’m seeking. It’s definitely not about having six-pack abs and looking like Timothee Chalamet in the face or anything. It’s more about attitude than anything else. I’ll be frank — I’ve had some incredible sex with some butt ugly dudes, so I’m not upholding any kind of unrealistic standards here.
If it’s not there in the beginning, it won’t develop over time. If I don’t get that heartbeat in the vagina right away, it’s not something that’s going to come later. I’m the type of person who knows right away how I feel about someone. I’m not really willing to waste my time dating someone for ages, hoping that intense sexual chemistry is going to develop because I know for a fact that it won’t.
I’m a highly sexual woman and I won’t apologize for it. When I tell some guys about my love of sex/need for sexual chemistry, the reactions I get range from confused to enraged to totally misogynistic. I’ve been accused of being a slut, of asking why I care so much about that when I’m supposed to be looking for “love,” etc. I like sex, so what? Men wouldn’t feel weird about admitting that freely, so why would I?
A lot of guys can’t keep up with me — I want one who can. Another element of sexual chemistry is a guy who’s on my level. A lot of people say guys have much higher libidos than women, but I’m here to tell you that I’ve dated more than one guy who might as well have been voluntarily celibate given how little sex they wanted to have with me. I’m hot, I’m adventurous in the bedroom, and I don’t just lay there like a dead fish. I need a guy who appreciates what he has in me.
Guys want women who are f–kable too. One of the most annoying things about people thinking I’m weird for saying I want a guy who gives me a heartbeat in my vagina is that men are forever rating women on how screwable we are. They rate our boobs, butts, what they think we’d look like giving them a BJ, etc. No one seems to think there’s a problem with that, so why do people hate on me so much for adopting that same attitude? I’m not here for it.