Why I Want To Be The Extra Girl In A Threesome With A Couple

It’s not uncommon these days for heterosexual couples who would otherwise consider themselves monogamous, to look for another woman to join them in bed. Unfortunately, finding her can be challenging, so much so that these women are dubbed “unicorns” for their unattainability. That’s a shame no one’s approached me because I’d be totally into it.

I get to make someone’s dream come true. 

Having been on both sides of a “unicorn hunt” at different times in my life, I know how frustrating it can be to look for someone for a threesome and not have any luck. I love the thought of helping a couple fulfill their fantasy. There are few things hotter than that to me! Knowing that I’m helping a couple explore something new and exciting feels amazing.

Communication between the couple goes way up and that’s heartening to witness. 

In situations like this, where the sex is more planned from the start, there tends to be a lot more open and frank communication and this is something I love. With three people’s feelings involved, two of whom are already in a relationship, there’s a lot of potential for misunderstanding. Because there’s more emotional risk, the people involved are often more aware of the need for open, clear, respectful communication. In my opinion, more communication can only ever be a good thing!

Exploring my sexuality with another woman is exciting. 

Assuming the other woman is open to sexual contact with me, this is one of the biggest factors for me in FMF threesomes. Most of my sexual experience is with men and I’ve often found it difficult to initiate relationships with women. An FMF threesome can be a beautiful opportunity to explore my sexuality with another woman in an environment that feels safe.

Observing couple dynamics is fascinating. 

Have you ever watched a couple making out in public and found it hard to look away? There’s something fascinating about watching intimacy between two people. The way they touch each other, the way they look at each other, the way they talk to each other—it’s curious because it’s a glimpse into their inner world of closeness, connection, and desire. Now imagine you get to be a part of that!

I have relatively little to lose. 

As the third person in a couple’s threesome, I’m in the very fortunate position of having little at stake in the situation. While a couple might have more potential for jealousy or insecurity, I’m able to come into the threesome without the same dangers. This doesn’t mean I’m absolved of responsibility—quite the opposite actually. Rather than getting caught up in my own stories, I’m able to be there to support the other people and help ease fears if need be. Of course, I also desire respect and care from the others. The ideal is that everyone will support each other if the need arises.

There’s a huge amount of trust involved. 

For most people, anything outside of strict monogamy is new, exciting, and scary. For a couple to invite me into their sexual relationship, there must be a strong sense of trust from everybody. Sharing trust in such an intimate setting is a beautiful thing and something that I want more of in my life in all relationships. When we make ourselves vulnerable to each other, we open up the possibility for deep connection and that’s such a valuable thing.

I want to live in a sex-positive world. 

After centuries of sexual repression, our world is opening up to the plethora of modes of sexual expression and exploration that have always existed within us. Taking part in a threesome and exploring different dynamics of sexuality is one way for me to celebrate my own liberation and move away from shame in sexuality. It’s a very practical expression of sex-positivity in my life.

There’s so much novelty in it. 

Our brains respond to novelty with a huge dopamine rush so needless to say, it feels awesome. To the couple, I might be the first new person either of them has slept with in a while, and being new to somebody is so much fun. On the other side, I now have two new sexual partners, each of which is exciting and fascinating in their own unique way. On top of all that, the whole experience of a threesome is very likely a new adventure for all of us. The novelty value in the whole situation makes for a ton of excitement!

Sharing something like that can create a deep bond. 

Sharing deep, intense and potentially risky experiences with people can create a bond like nothing else. There’s something very beautiful about sharing my sexuality with someone, and when it’s with several someones at the same time, it feels like we all share a secret, one that’s inherently tied to our connection with each other.

Sex is fun! 

Outside all the more philosophical and altruistic reasons, sex is just awesome! And sex with two people, well, you do the math. Exploring two new people in an exciting and intense experience, sharing that electric sexual energy of a new connection, not knowing who’s touching whom—this is what my fantasies are made of!

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