Are You & Your Partner Really Sexually Compatible? Here’s How You Know

Finding a partner that you’re sexually compatible with is extremely important because if you’re both unhappy in the bedroom, even if everything else is perfect, it could easily lead to the relationship’s demise. Here are some ways to know if you’ve got great chemistry in the bedroom.

You’re not afraid to talk about sex with each other.

You need to have good communication so you know where the other person stands at all times. If you’re not on the same page mentally, there’s no way you can be on the same page sexually. You should always be honest with the other person and tell your partner exactly what you want. If you can’t do that, there’s a problem.

You love learning what the other person wants in bed.

Because you’re not afraid to talk about it, you know what the other person likes. By communicating about sex, you get to know your partner so well that you know what makes the person tick and what doesn’t. For example, you know that your partner likes to be massaged before sex or that they love it best when you touch in certain places but not in others. The more you know your partner in the bedroom, the more sexually compatible you’ll be.

You both know what you want.

You should know what your expectations are when it comes to sex so you’re able to tell your partner. That includes knowing your sexual preferences, what you want sex to mean in a relationship, and what you expect from your partner. If you don’t know what you want, you might eventually realize that you and your partner aren’t a good match.

You have pretty similar libidos.

You’re a match sexually if you both want to have sex with a similar frequency. If one of you wants it once a month and the other wants it five times a week, you could be in trouble. There are natural ups and downs in the frequency of sex in a relationship and in each person’s individual libido, but there shouldn’t be too large of a gap in how much you both want to have sex. It could lead to big problems.

You can compromise.

Compromise is essential for sexual compatibility because no two people are identical. If you can somehow meet in the middle, you may be able to have a successful relationship even if your sex drives differ. Your sexual differences are less likely to break your relationship up if you can work with each other so that you’re both satisfied. You both should be willing to make the effort to meet each other’s needs so you can be in sync sexually.

You have similar sexual preferences.

If one of you is into BDSM and the other likes it vanilla and in the same position every time, it’s going to be hard to make that relationship work and to find a compromise. If one of you wants an open relationship and the other doesn’t, it’s only going to cause problems in the long run. If you don’t vary too much in your preferences, you’re probably compatible sexually.

You have the same idea of what cheating means.

Both people need to be on the same page about what constitutes as cheating to be sexually compatible. For example, if one person thinks flirting is OK and the other sees it as unfaithfulness, there’s no way it’s going to end well. Or if you’re still on Tinder and your partner would be upset to find that out, you’re not on the same page. You both need to agree on what behavior is and isn’t acceptable.

You’re comfortable with each other.

You aren’t afraid to be yourself around your partner in every way, including in the bedroom. If you’re honest about what you want and need, you’ll be able to have a much better sex life with your significant other. If you lie about what you like, there’s no way you can be on the same page sexually. Plus, your partner will be upset after finding out you haven’t been authentic.

You don’t compare your sex life to anyone else’s. 

For example, some people are so concerned with how often they’re having sex compared to other couples. In reality, as long as you’re both satisfied in bed, it doesn’t matter what anyone else is doing. Each person and each couple has different wants and needs. One couple might have sex four times a week while another only once a week, yet both couples are happy. If you can focus on how good the sex is rather than how often you’re having it, you’ll have a much better chance of being a good match sexually.

You aren’t selfish.

You should have your own needs met, of course, but you also need to care about what your partner wants. You should want to make the other person happy in bed. If you’re only focused on yourself, there’s no way you’re both going to be sexually satisfied. Things aren’t going to be perfect all the time, but wanting to please the other person goes a long way. Compatible partners care about each other just as much as they care about themselves.

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