Assertive women get a bad rep, but you know your life is better because you aren’t afraid to speak up for yourself and what you believe in. Getting to a place of such strength took time, but you’re an amazing person as a result. Here’s how you know you’ve reached peak badass:
You’ve been called a bitch one too many times. People aren’t used to women actually speaking up for themselves, so when you do it, others are really surprised. Some are so surprised that they come out and call you a bitch. You don’t care because you know it comes with the territory of being assertive. A woman speaking up for herself seems so wild to many people that you appear to be a bitch. You can be when needed, and you’re damn proud of it.
You know that if a man acted in the same way, he’d be applauded. There’s a huge double standard of men being seen as manly if they’re being assertive, but women are seen as bitches and acting out of line. You don’t care what you’re called because you’re out to smash double standards. You don’t want dudes to have privileges that you don’t, so it doesn’t matter what other people think in the process.
You’re not afraid to ruffle some feathers. Since you’re so fearless about what other people think of you, you aren’t afraid to make them uncomfortable. You aren’t scared of making waves and ruffling feathers. For example, if a guy inappropriately grabs you in public, you’re definitely not afraid to make a scene. After all, he just did something wildly inappropriate. You know he may deny it or call you a crazy person, but you don’t care.
You terrify some men. You’re a super assertive woman and that scares the crap out of some men. In dating, handfuls of guys run the other direction when they realize who you are. You’re totally cool with it, though, because any man that can’t handle a woman simply speaking her wants and needs is not at all worth your time. You even find it pretty funny that you terrify some grown men.
You take no sh*t. Nothing gets past you in terms of your needs, wants, and boundaries. Especially in dating, you’re your best advocate and when someone crosses you, they’ll hear about it. It’s not that you’re unreasonable or crazy, you just speak up when someone wrongs you and you try to prevent it to the best of your abilities.
You ask a lot of questions. If you don’t understand something, you’re sure to ask the person to elaborate. Someone else might be afraid to speak up and ask questions, but you don’t mind at all. You’re known for asking a lot of questions and even sometimes challenging authority. After all, you want to understand and you want to make sure your voice is heard.
When you talk people listen. You have a voice that commands attention when you’re being assertive. People listen when you start asking for what you need. For example, if a restaurant makes your food wrong then refuses to give you a refund, you aren’t one to let it pass. You’re one to make it known that you demand a refund and that you’re not leaving until you have one.
You’re confident AF. One of the reasons people listen to you is because it’s wildly obvious that you feel self-assured. You’re a confident woman, especially when you begin to ask for what you need. This is where people may think you’re bitchy or full of yourself, but really you’re just appropriate levels of confident and assertive. You refuse to apologize and that’s great.
You don’t sugar-coat what you have to say. Women are conditioned to defer to men, to be nice, and to not make too much of a fuss. You’ve unlearned this behavior and you’ve learned that you’re not required to sugar coat. People are going to think you’re a b*tch when you’re just being assertive, but in reality, you’re delivering them what’s really going on — nothing more, nothing less.
You often find yourself in leadership roles or positions of authority. The way you carry yourself is not lost on employers. It’s obvious that you have a stage presence and can cut right through bullsh*t. As a result of this, you often find yourself in leadership roles–having to be effective in communicating to large groups of people.
You’re successful in your career. When you move through job roles, you use your skills of asking for what you want and need. You’re comfortable with negotiating salaries when many women are terrified of even broaching the subject. As a result, you’ve gotten promotions and raises left and right.
You’re passionate and opinionated, but you don’t always think you’re right. Just because you’re assertive, confident, passionate, and opinionated doesn’t mean you think you have all the answers. It also doesn’t mean you think you can get everything that you want. You know that you’re wrong sometimes, just like every other human, but this doesn’t stop you from speaking up about your needs.
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