No man wants to be seen as being insecure and unsure of himself, but sometimes we do certain things that make us seem and feel less than confident. That’s because many of us fall into people-pleasing patterns in order to be well-liked and more respected (or so we think). If you want to believe in yourself a bit more, here are a few habits to kick to the curb.
1. Always Agreeing
One of the key habits to break if you aim to be a truly confident man is the constant need to agree with everyone all the time. While it’s important to be open-minded and considerate, constantly agreeing, even when you hold a different opinion, can undermine your self-confidence. Stand up for your beliefs and values, and don’t be afraid to voice your opinions respectfully.
2. Apologizing Unnecessarily
Saying “sorry” when you’ve done something wrong is a sign of respect and self-awareness. However, excessive, unnecessary apologies can make you appear unsure and can take a toll on your confidence. Own your actions and decisions, and only apologize when it’s genuinely warranted.
3. Seeking Validation
If you find yourself constantly seeking approval or validation for your actions, it’s time to change this behavior. Real confidence comes from within, not from the fleeting praise or acknowledgment of others. Believe in your abilities and decisions, and let your actions speak for themselves.
4. Avoiding Confrontation
Confident people don’t shy away from difficult conversations or confrontations. They tackle issues head-on and communicate their thoughts assertively. If you’re often avoiding confronting issues to keep the peace, it’s time to say goodbye to this behavior to become a more confident man.
5. Sacrificing Your Needs
While caring for other people is commendable, consistently putting their needs above your own can lead to resentment and damage your self-worth. True confidence comes from recognizing your own needs and taking steps to meet them, while also being considerate of other people.
6. Hiding Your True Self
If you’re constantly altering your personality or interests to fit in with people, this behavior can undermine your confidence. Truly confident men are comfortable with who they are and don’t feel the need to hide their true selves to please people. Instead, they know the people who belong in their lives will find their way there regardless, no facade needed.
7. Playing Down Achievements
If you have a habit of downplaying your achievements to avoid overshadowing other people, it’s time to let go of this behavior. Celebrating your successes and acknowledging your hard work is a vital part of building confidence. Don’t shy away from taking credit where it’s due.
8. Overcommitting
Saying ‘yes’ to every request can leave you feeling overwhelmed and undervalued. Learning to set boundaries and say ‘no’ when necessary is a crucial step in becoming a more confident man.
9. People-Pleasing Language
Using hedging language like “I just thought” or “Maybe we could” can make you appear less confident. Practice speaking clearly and assertively to communicate your ideas effectively and confidently.
10. Avoiding Risks
If you’re always taking the safe route to avoid disappointing people, it’s time to break free from this habit. According to Harvard Summer School, taking risks and stepping out of your comfort zone are important aspects of growing your confidence. Remember, it’s your life, and you should live it on your terms.
11. Neglecting Personal Growth
If you’re continuously focusing on pleasing other people, chances are you’re neglecting your own personal growth and development. Confident men invest time in enhancing their skills, knowledge, and overall personal growth. Make sure to dedicate time to your self-improvement.
12. Ignoring Your Instincts
If you’re constantly second-guessing your decisions to avoid offending people all the time, it’s time to trust your instincts. Confidence comes from trusting your judgment and making decisions without constantly worrying about what other people may think.
13. Not Setting Personal Goals
If you’re always prioritizing other people’s goals over your own, you might be undermining your confidence. It’s essential to set personal goals and work towards them to boost your self-belief and determination. Otherwise, how will you ever grow?
14. Trying to Fit In
Constantly trying to adapt to fit in with other people can erode your self-confidence. Instead, value your uniqueness and individuality. Confident men don’t fear standing out from the crowd and being true to themselves. In fact, they’re quite happy to celebrate the things that make them different.
15. Ignoring Self-Care
According to Verywell Mind, people-pleasers often neglect their own physical, emotional, and mental well-being. However, self-care is a critical component of confidence. It’s essential to prioritize your health and well-being to maintain a positive and confident outlook.
16. Feeling Responsible for Everyone Else’s Happiness
If you often find yourself feeling responsible for making sure everyone else is happy at the expense of your own happiness, this is a behavior to bid goodbye to. While it’s great to care for people, confident men understand that everyone is responsible for their own happiness.
17. Fearing Failure
Lastly, if you’re constantly avoiding new opportunities or challenges for fear of failure or disappointing people, it’s time to change that mindset. Confident men see failures as opportunities to learn and grow. Embrace challenges and don’t let the fear of failure hold you back.