13 Things People With Low Self-Esteem Tend To Say A Lot

13 Things People With Low Self-Esteem Tend To Say A Lot

Ever catch yourself saying things that make you think, “Wait, why am I being so hard on myself?” Well, you’re not alone. Here are some phrases that might sneak into your daily talk when your self-worth isn’t exactly sky-high. Low self-esteem has a way of showing itself no matter how much we try to hide it.

1. “I’m so stupid,” or “I’m not good enough.”

Oh, this old chestnut. When we mess up and the first thing we say is, “I’m so stupid,” it’s like we’re our own worst critic. It’s one thing to be humble, but constantly putting ourselves down? Not cool. It’s like we’ve got this little voice in our head that’s stuck on the ‘not good enough’ channel. Switching to a kinder, more forgiving voice can make a world of difference.

2. “I’m sorry,” or “I’m always apologizing.”

Ever find yourself saying sorry for, like, everything? Even when it’s not your fault? It’s kind of like we’re trying to avoid any possibility of someone being upset with us. But here’s the thing – you don’t have to be the human version of an apology note. It’s about finding that balance between being polite and not taking the blame for everything under the sun.

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4. “I don’t deserve to be happy,” or “I don’t deserve good things to happen to me.”

This one’s a bit of a heartbreaker. If you catch yourself saying you don’t deserve happiness, it’s like you’re putting up a ‘no entry’ sign for all the good stuff in life. Everyone deserves a bit of sunshine and joy, including you. It’s about reminding ourselves that, hey, we’re worthy of happiness just as much as anyone else.

5. “I’m always comparing myself to other people.”

Ah, the comparison game. It’s like a sport where we always end up feeling like we’re in last place. Always measuring ourselves against others can be exhausting and, honestly, a bit of a downer. It’s cool to admire others, but don’t forget you’ve got your own awesome stuff going on. Embrace your unique awesomeness!

6. “I’m afraid to fail,” or “I’m afraid to take risks.”

Being scared to fail or take risks can be your self-esteem getting jittery. It’s like you’re not backing yourself to nail it. But hey, taking a leap now and then is how you grow. And if you do faceplant? It’s not the end of the world – it’s just a stepping stone to getting better. Embrace the risk – it makes life a bit more exciting!

7. “I’m not sure what I want to do with my life,” or “I have no direction.”

Feeling like you’re floating without direction? It’s totally okay not to have it all figured out. Life isn’t a race, and there’s no deadline for having a master plan. This uncertainty can be your self-esteem whispering doubts about your future. Take your time, explore, and remember: it’s your journey, and there’s no wrong way to travel it.

8. “I’m always putting everyone else’s needs before my own.”

If you’re always the one making sacrifices, it’s like you’re saying everyone else’s needs are more important than your own. Being kind and helpful is awesome, but don’t forget to save some of that kindness for yourself. You matter just as much as anyone else, and your needs are just as important.

9. “I’m always looking for someone to save me,” or “I need someone to take care of me.”

Relying on others to swoop in and save the day? It’s comforting to have support, but believing you need someone else to fix your life is like selling yourself short. You’ve got more power than you think. Sure, life can be tough, but you’re tougher. Remember, you’re the hero in your story, not the sidekick.

10. “I’m always giving up on myself,” or “I’m a quitter.”

Calling yourself a quitter is like shutting the door on your potential. Everyone has moments where they feel like throwing in the towel. But here’s the thing: every day is a new chance to try again. Your past doesn’t define your future, and just because something didn’t work out before doesn’t mean it won’t now. Give yourself another shot!

11. “I’m always negative and complaining,” or “I’m never happy.”

Stuck in a bit of a negativity loop? It’s like your self-esteem is on a bit of a downer. Constantly complaining or seeing the glass as half empty can be a sign you’re not feeling great about yourself. Try flipping the script – focus on the positives, even the small ones. It’s about finding little joys and silver linings. Trust me, they’re there!

12. “I never do anything right,” or “I always mess up.”

Ever catch yourself saying you can’t do anything right? It’s like you’re keeping score of every little goof. But here’s the scoop: everyone trips up sometimes. It doesn’t mean you’re doomed to a lifetime of mistakes. It’s about learning and moving forward, not keeping a tally of every stumble. Remember, messing up doesn’t make you a mess-up. It makes you human.

13. Nobody really likes me,” or “I’m not interesting.”

Feeling like you’re not the life of the party or the most fascinating person in the room? That’s a common whisper from the little self-esteem gremlin. But guess what? You don’t have to be the center of attention to be likable or interesting. Everyone has their unique spark, and so do you. It’s not a popularity contest; it’s about being comfortable in your own skin and connecting with those who appreciate the real you.

14. “I should just stay quiet,” or “My opinion doesn’t matter.”

Thinking your thoughts aren’t worth voicing? That’s your self-esteem playing the shy card. But here’s a thought: your opinions and ideas are just as valuable as anyone else’s. Staying quiet is like keeping a library of awesome books locked up – no one gets to read them! Speak up. Your voice adds to the conversation, and what you have to say matters.

Originally from Australia, Emma Mills graduated from the University of Queensland with a dual degree in Philosophy and Applied Linguistics before moving to Los Angeles to become a professional matchmaker (a bit of a shift, obviously). Since 2015, she has helped more than 150 people find lasting love and remains passionate about bringing amazing singletons together.

Emma is also the author of the upcoming Hachette publication, "Off the Beaten Track: Finding Lasting Love in the Least Likely of Places," due out in January 2025.
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