10 Lazy Flirting Behaviors That Just Don’t Cut It

When someone is flirting with you, presumably it means they like you and are interested in dating you. If that’s the case, they need to put in some serious effort and show you that they’re actually worth your time. That’s why these lazy half-efforts just don’t cut it when it comes to flirting.

  1. They ask you to “tell [them] about yourself.” You start chatting to someone on a dating app and that’s their opening line? Okay, it’s better than if they’d just said “hey,” but it’s still a generic text to avoid. They probably sent that out to tons of matches. They should have asked you something specific they read in your profile to show that they were genuinely interested in getting to know you instead.
  2. They send you a gif. If you receive a gif inspired by The Notebook from your crush, you might think, “Awww.” Same goes for when your crush sends you romantic song lyrics or a poem. But what happened to them using their own words? While romantic gifs they want to share with you can be sweet, they shouldn’t rely on them to flirt.
  3. They only compliment your looks. Everyone wants to feel gorgeous, especially in the eyes of their crush, but it’s not good enough if the person you’re into only ever compliments your looks. Come on, you want something of more substance! It’s just too easy to tell someone they’re hot or sexy. What about your more meaningful qualities?
  4. They like your posts. If someone is trying to show you that they like you by “liking” your Instagram or Facebook posts, that’s okay but it’s not enough of a clue. They have to be a little more obvious about their intentions.
  5. They tell a friend. Um, is this high school? Seriously, if your friend says that your crush told them that he or she has a huge crush on you, that’s interesting and fun, but your crush shouldn’t expect that to put the ball in your court. I mean, are you supposed to do the work for them? Nope. You deserve someone who actually makes a first move, not a half-hearted attempt!
  6. They send you a friend request. Instead of asking for your number when they meet you, they get your full name and then friend or follow you on social media. It feels like such a weak way to get to know someone, and considering how fake social media can be, it’s much less personal than if they’d texted you. If you accept the invitation, it might tell them you like them, but it’s diluted flirting at its best. There are much more successful ways to flirt with someone.
  7. They re-tweet you. It’s a nice ego boost to see that your crush has retweeted one of your witty tweets or recent achievements you shared online. It shows they’re paying attention. But wouldn’t it be even nicer if they had to reach out and tell you how your post made them laugh because it was so funny or how they wanted to congratulate you for reaching your goal?
  8. They text you late at night. This doesn’t even feel like flirting anymore – it feels like the person’s just trying to hook up or is drunk, horny, or feeling bored. Ugh. It takes a bit more effort to think of something interesting to say in the morning. Which brings us to…
  9. They send the “good morning, beautiful” text. While this one is generally a crowd-pleaser, it can also be a generic way for someone to try to keep themselves in your thoughts. They really should be able to come up with something a bit more memorable and original if they want to make a good impression on you.
  10. They give you TMI. While you might think that a person who tells you loads about themselves is opening up to you because they like you, and this can be seen as a higher level of flirting, it can also be that the person’s offloading on you because they’re selfish. What’s better is if they take an interest in who you are by asking you questions for a change. I mean, hearing about their high school yearbook fiasco or how they don’t get along with their dad is great and all, but could they let you get a word in edgewise so you actually feel acknowledged?
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.