10 Reasons Confident Women Have The Hardest Time Finding Love

Sadly, confident women have a hard time finding love, but it’s mostly because more often than not, guys are either intimidated by us or just aren’t on our level. Here’s why finding love is so difficult for us:

  1. We refuse to settle. Confident women have their bar set high in love because we’re able to do so. We’re well aware of how much we deserve, so we won’t settle for anything less. This fact cuts out a huge percentage of the dating pool, making finding love harder, but we don’t care. Confident women would rather wait to find something true and substantial than settle for toxic guys or decent ones who just aren’t good matches.
  2. You can read our feelings all over our faces. If we’re on a date with someone we’re not feeling, we have a hell of a time hiding it. Confident women are outspoken about our feelings, so those feelings tend to be written all over our faces. This gets rid of the men who don’t match up right away, but it still leaves us with fewer choices.
  3. We have a hard time finding someone who meets our standards. Having high standards is a natural move for confident women. We don’t settle for less because we’re shooting for the stars. When we’re in the dating game, we keep hoping we’ll find someone to meet our high standards, but people keep falling short. It’s not that we’re picky, wejust know what we want.
  4. Some men seriously can’t handle us. It’s quite hard to find love when our confidence sends some men running for the hills. These men are intimidated by our unapologetic showing of self. The way that we carry ourselves and behave in the world definitely freaks some men out. That’s okay, though. Confident women know that these are the wrong men for us. We’re waiting for the ones who aren’t afraid of who we are.
  5. We disregard dating rules and games. Too many people play dating games and follow weird rules while they’re looking for a lover. Confident women don’t need to play games. We know that what we bring to the table is way above average, so we’re not worried about petty games and dating rules that we didn’t create. This filters out many men who are used to playing games. Confident women are waiting for grown men.
  6. We don’t need someone else to make us feel okay. Unfortunately, the dating and love world is filled with codependent and toxic relationships. People are looking for a lover to fix them and make them feel whole. Confident women, on the other hand, don’t need another person to make us feel okay. We know that we’re already more than okay all by ourselves. We relish in this fact and definitely scare some people away, but again — we scare away guys we don’t want in the first place.
  7. We’re great at setting boundaries. Confident women aren’t afraid to set boundaries. Sometimes this means saying “no,” which some men don’t want to hear repeatedly. Nonetheless, we’ve mastered the art of setting boundaries, even when it’s unpopular. We stick to what’s true for us and unfortunately, a lot of guys don’t like it. Good riddance! We’ll only settle for men who respect our boundaries.
  8. We’re not afraid to walk away. While many people are terrified of being single, confident women definitely aren’t. The fact that we aren’t afraid to be alone gives us the ultimate freedom in relationships. We’ll never stick around when it isn’t working — we’ll always walk away. This makes it hard for us to find love, but it also means our dignity and respect is regularly left intact.
  9. We don’t chase. If men are playing hard to get, are just out of reach, or push confident women away, we don’t chase. We know there are suitors lined up around the door to take their place — they’re definitely not irreplaceable. Confident women love ourselves too much to chase men who aren’t worth our time.
  10. Ultimately, our pool for potential matches is way smaller. When someone says “there are more fish in the sea” to confident women, we know that our sea is actually more like a lake. Our pool of matches to choose from is smaller than your average person’s because we have so many standards that most people can’t meet. We’ve made peace with this fact and know that although finding love is hard, it’ll ultimately be worth it.
Ginelle has been writing professionally for more than six years and has a bachelor’s degree in digital marketing & design. Her writing has appeared on Birdie, Thought Catalog, Tiny Buddha and more. You can follow her on Instagram @ginelletesta, via her Facebook page, or through her website at ginelletesta.com.