Experience is the best teacher — if you’re not learning from your mistakes, you’re not growing as a person and you’re setting yourself up for failure. If you’ve had your heart broken by someone once, why would you give them a chance to do it again?
Why would you want to be with someone who caused you pain?
Instead of reminiscing on the good times, take a good look back and remember how much pain he caused you. Sure, you may have healed, but it wasn’t the best feeling when it was actually happening, and you don’t want to go through it again.
The same crap that ended your relationship will still be there — it hasn’t gone away.
Rekindling old flames sounds great in theory, until you actually do it and realize nothing’s actually changed. If there were problems in the relationship before, then there will be problems again. Those issues don’t just go away magically.
You don’t have the luxury of starting with a clean slate.
There’s history between you two which means there’s a lot of room for resentment and grudges. Keep in mind that you’re picking up where you left off, not re-setting the clock and starting over again. There’s no starting over when it comes to past loves.
You’ll just end up getting hurt all over again.
Don’t put yourself through the whole process of getting hurt when you’ve already gone through it before. Opening up a wound that hasn’t fully healed can take twice as long to fix than the first cut.
You’ve already taken the time to get over him.
It would be a shame to undo everything you’ve done to get over him. Don’t throw that away just to go back to the same place you were before.
You won’t discover anything about him that you didn’t already know.
There are no surprises when it comes to someone you know very well. You know how he operates, you know what sets him off, and you know his flaws. The mystery is gone, so don’t think that you’ll discover something new.
He’s still the same person he was before.
It’s very rare for people to instantly change when it comes to relationships. Part of the reason why some of us love to date people who are broken is because we secretly want to be the one who can fix them. Unfortunately, you can’t “fix” a guy. He has to change on his own, when it’s right for him.
It’ll just end up being a waste of more time.
If it doesn’t work out again, then you’ve just doubled the amount of time wasted on one single person. Unless you are 100 percent sure that he’s The One, don’t waste another minute on him.
There are plenty of other fish in the sea.
No one person is so irreplaceable to the point where you need to be exhausting all of your energy just to be with him. There are millions of other guys in this world who can give you the love that you deserve.
It’s his loss, not yours.
If you’ve already moved on and he wants a second chance, stand your ground and don’t give in. The moment has already passed. He screwed it up the first time, and that’s on him. At the end of the day, it’s his loss, not yours.
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