You want to have sex with the guy you’ve met, and that’s fine, but before you decide to stay the night at his place after a romp, consider having the best of both worlds and going for a half-night stand — that is, sex without the sleeping over. If the description alone doesn’t sway you, here’s why doing the deed and heading home may be your new jam:
- You take things to the next level without bogging them down. A relationship might stem from having a one-night stand, but if so, the last thing you want is to tie it down and make it boring. Waking up to his sleepy face after you’ve had a night of listening to his snoring can make you feel jaded about the relationship before it’s even started.
- You avoid morning-after awkwardness. One-night stands can be awkward as hell. Is there anything worse than a guy you’ve slept with asking you if you’d like coffee when he doesn’t even know your last name (or barely remembers your first)? The truth is, if you’d like to GTFO of his house to avoid the awkwardness, do just that. Leave after sex when the endorphins are still kicking and you both feel good, not the morning after when you’ve both sobered up and feel strange around each other. It makes your exit so much harder.
- You don’t rush into anything. Okay, so you might think that since you’ve already had sex, you HAVE rushed into something, but sleeping next to someone is more intimate than sleeping with them sexually. You don’t want to do both so quickly if you don’t really know the guy, as it can make things feel a little too serious too soon.
- You prevent doing things that you’re not ready to do. You’ve known this guy for like, what, a few hours? Now you’re going to be sleeping in the same bed as him all night? It’s not only potentially awkward, but can also be something that doesn’t feel right for you to do together right now. If you force it, you can ruin any chance there might have been of you two becoming a couple (if that’s even what you want).
- You get time to think. You need time away from this guy so that you can think about him with a clear head. It’s easy to get caught up in thinking that you’re really into him because the sex was great, but that might not be the case. Go home and give yourself some time to figure things out so you can make the right decision.
- You get your privacy and comfort. Is there anything better than climbing into your bed and curling up with your cats, a glass of wine, and some Netflix? Or washing off your makeup and tying your hair into a messy knot without worrying about what a guy will think about your appearance? Not only will you get to chill in your own space, but even if you plan to never see the guy again, at least you’ll leave him with a mental picture of you looking your best.
- Things don’t get too comfortable too quickly. If you’re already doing the whole “sleeping together and having leftover pizza for breakfast” thing, you risk losing the spark before it ever becomes a raging fire. Relationships take time to grow and the early stages of it should be filled with chemistry and mystery. Don’t kill it.
- You get to play a bit hard to get. If you’re interested in the guy you’ve slept with and you got him into bed, it doesn’t mean that the chase should end. Hell, no — it’s just beginning! Now’s the time to play a bit hard to get and make him earn more of your attention. If he wants to see you again and properly date you, he’s got to work for it. Just because you’ve had sex doesn’t mean that he should stop making an effort, so don’t let him slack off!
- You leave on a high. It’s horrible to think you’ve overstayed your welcome, especially if the guy doesn’t live alone. Instead, leave after sex when you’re both glowing from the great experience. It’s like when you’re chatting to a guy you’ve met at the club. You should leave the conversation when it’s at its peak, not when you’ve exhausted topics of conversation and are left feeling awkward. If you leave when things are great, then you give him a reason to want you and make it more likely that he’ll miss you.
- You focus on your pleasure. If you’re horny, you can have a one-night stand with a guy… but who says you have to stick around afterwards? It’s so much more liberating to walk away without feeling like you have to stay for breakfast because he’s a nice guy (although not your type) or feeling anxious because the bathroom window’s too small to climb out of. If you know the sex was just a one-off, you can leave afterwards when you feel good about it without getting swayed by some pressure to stay. That will only ruin the great experience you had. If people consider it selfish to do them and ditch them, the answer to that is that since it’s your sexual pleasure, you have every right to be!