10 Reasons Strong Women Would Rather Be Alone Than Settle For Mediocre Men

Wanting a relationship doesn’t make you weak, but when you’re a woman who’s comfortable in her own skin, you know that you don’t need a relationship to be complete. There are way too many lackluster guys out there who will dull our shine, but this is why women who are truly strong would rather go through the rest of our lives single than be with guys who don’t give us what we need:

  1. We can spoil ourselves. Strong women can and will pamper ourselves, whether that means spending the night in with a face mask and a good movie or splurging on a purchase we’ve been wanting to make. When it comes to finding a partner, we want someone who can give us things like loyalty and good communication rather than jewelry or a fancy home-cooked meal. If we can’t get the first two things from the guy we’re dating, his ability to provide the latter two things isn’t going to be enough to make us stick around.
  2. We don’t need anyone dragging us down. Powerful, driven women know how to set a target and never take our eyes away from it—and anyone who tries to distract us from our goals isn’t going to be around for very long. We know that insecure guys have no place in our lives and that we’ll regret it if we let a man create even a small obstacle on the way to achieving our dreams.
  3. We’re too busy to deal with drama. When you’re juggling a job, hobbies, and a social life, you have no time for immature men who try to pick fights over every little thing. Strong women won’t put up with a guy’s B.S. just because he’s good in bed—we have deadlines to meet and friends to catch up with, and a man who’s “meh” isn’t going to be worth the space he takes up in our schedules.
  4. We know that occasional loneliness is better than constant heartache. Even the toughest women get lonely sometimes, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But strong women know that even the nights we spend wishing we had someone to cuddle with are better than nights spent wondering why a guy hasn’t texted us back.
  5. We don’t need a man to hold us up. Everyone needs someone to lean on when times get tough, but strong women know that we don’t need a lame excuse for a boyfriend to use as a crutch. We have other sources of support, like friends and family, and when we have no choice but to go it alone, we know how to power through and make it out on the other side even stronger.
  6. We only surround ourselves with the best people. If you can pick your own apples, why would you choose a rotten one? Strong women choose our social circles carefully, which means that anyone who’s even remotely toxic is going to be cut out immediately. We’re not going to go through all that effort just to let a sub-par guy have a free pass, no matter how hot he is.
  7. We don’t have a boyfriend-shaped hole in their lives. It’s not that strong women don’t want a boyfriend, we just don’t need one. If the right guy comes along and treats us well, of course we’ll give him the same treatment we expect from him. But if the guy we’re seeing doesn’t meet our totally reasonable standards, nothing is going to be missing from our lives if we let him go.
  8. We know our worth. It’s easy to settle for a man when you think that he’s all you deserve, but strong women know better than that. We know we all have areas where we could improve, but we aren’t going to set the bar too low just because we’re not perfect. Truly confident women will never stay with a guy just because we think he’s the best we can get, and we’d rather be single than settle for less than we deserve.
  9. We know better than to try to force something that will never work. Strong women have gained their strength from experience and we know by know that wearing ourselves down to try to make a relationship work isn’t worth the effort. We’d much rather spend our time and energy pursuing things that will pay off, and if that means we have to be single while we get our degrees or advance our careers, that’s fine by us.
  10. We don’t want a mediocre man taking the position of someone better. Just because a powerful woman hasn’t met her dream man doesn’t mean that he’s not out there, and she’ll be damned if she loses the opportunity to be with him because she’s already with someone who doesn’t treat her right. Strong women know that even if they’re single now (and have been for a long time), they could meet a great guy at any time, and until then, they’re just fine going it alone.
Averi is a word nerd and Brazilian jiu jitsu brown belt. She's also a TEFL/TESOL-certified ESL teacher and an equine enthusiast. Originally from Pennsylvania, she lived in Costa Rica for a while before moving to Australia. In addition to her work as a writer and editor for Bolde, she also has bylines with Little Things and regularly writes for Jiu-Jitsu Times.

You can follow Averi on Instagram @bjjaveri or on Twitter under the same handle.