10 Relationship Dealbreakers For Independent Women

10 Relationship Dealbreakers For Independent Women ©iStock/svetikd

Everyone has their own set of dealbreakers when it comes to relationships, and we’re all entitled to that. If we know we wouldn’t be able to put up with something long-term, then there’s really no point in trying. Independent women probably have even more dealbreakers because we just have no interest in settling for “good enough.” We’d rather be alone than with someone who isn’t right, and we’re not afraid to dump someone if they don’t live up to our expectations. Here are some no-goes for us:

  1. He still lives with his parents. Guess what? Independent women value independence. Shocking, I know. Having our own place is something that’s important to us, so a guy who has no interest in doing his own laundry and grocery shopping and will continue to sponge off his parents for as long as possible just isn’t going to be very appealing.
  2. He doesn’t have his own friends. If a guy doesn’t have any close friends whatsoever, we’re going to wonder why. Clearly he has a problem maintaining relationships, not to mention he’s probably going to be clingy as hell if he never has friends to spend time his free time with.
  3. He’s too needy. A guy who needs constant validation and reassurance is going to get on our nerves pretty quick. No independent woman is going to be interested in a guy who has no self confidence— it’s just comes off as pathetic.
  4. He doesn’t understand that we need space. Me time is an important part of maintaining a level of individuality in a relationship. Just because we have a night free doesn’t mean we’re automatically going to spend it with him, and if he doesn’t get that, it’ll never work.
  5. He’s controlling. Independent women don’t need someone to take care of them, and they really don’t need a guy telling them what to do. Nothing will turn us off faster than a guy who thinks he can control our every move. We know what we’re doing, and we don’t need unsolicited advice from a guy who thinks he knows what we need better than we do.
  6. He likes to strangle-cuddle all night. I don’t know about anyone else, but sleeping alone has got to be one of my favourite things about being single. A guy who insists on holding me in a death grip all night long is just a warning sign of someone who wants to be an attached at the hip type of couple. And that’s just not my thing.
  7. He gets really jealous. He’s already so attached that he can’t stand the thought of another guy spending any significant amount of time with you. Irrational jealousy is a red flag for anyone, male or female, because it means they have trust issues, and that’s never going to be anything but a headache.
  8. He moves too quickly. Most independent women are in no rush to get into a serious relationship. In fact, easing into it is preferable because you’re so use to being single that it takes some adjusting to get comfortable opening up to someone again. If a guy confessing his love after the third date, you’ll be running for the hills.
  9. He’s extremely judgmental. Not only does he care too much what other people think, but he seems to always have an opinion on things that are none of his business. Independent women are often more the “live and let live” types, and they aren’t going to tolerate someone who can’t mind his own business.
  10. He doesn’t know what he wants. Indecisiveness in general is never an attractive quality, but if a guy is hot and cold about dating her, most women will just shut it down themselves and stop giving him the chance to play games. She has better things to do than interpret his mixed signals.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to Bolde.com, contributes regularly to AmongMen.ca, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.