Perfection is an impossible standard to attain and striving for it will only result in disappointment, especially in relationships. Every couple will always have its own problems but those problems aren’t necessarily life-ruining issues. These things might seem like imperfections to you but they really, truly aren’t:
- Arguing. Disagreements are inevitable in every relationship, but arguments in and of themselves aren’t a sign of the end times. If you’re speaking calmly and actually trying to resolve the issue instead of subtly insulting each other, you guys are more mature than a lot of couples out there. Arguments are a normal aspect of relationships. When you handle them well, that means you and your partner are a good match.
- Laughing at each other. Plenty of couples can laugh with each other, but only a special few can laugh at each other. Poking fun at your significant other means that the two of you know each other well enough to joke around without getting offended. That is far from an imperfection. The silliness can look like condescending bickering from the outside, but you guys are good together if both of you can take a joke and throw one back.
- Stress. A happy relationship isn’t an automatic fix for the everyday BS that keeps you up at night. Stress happens to everyone and you aren’t imperfect for feeling worn out when things get tough. If you and your partner can handle stress in healthy ways without being complete douchebags to each other, you make a good couple.
- Having different hobbies. Having different interests isn’t an imperfection. Your interests don’t have to align perfectly to have a functional relationship. Maintaining different hobbies after you start dating someone is a good thing. It means that you haven’t lost yourself in that relationship and you still have your individuality. Your partner’s hobbies don’t have to interest you and your hobbies don’t have to interest him. It’s fun to introduce each other to new things but it’s okay if you don’t always end up doing those things together. You’re good together if you can hold on to your hobbies without feeling the need to force them to become mutually satisfying.
- Not wanting kids. Neither of you are imperfect for not wanting kids despite the unwarranted criticism and angry flying spit that may end up in your faces. You’re lucky to have found a partner who’s on the same page as you. When you agree with each other in such a profound way and you’re making it work, you and your partner are good together.
- Spending time apart. Everyone needs alone time or time with their friends. You aren’t imperfect if you don’t want to spend every possible second with your significant other. Going your separate ways for the night doesn’t mean that you’re leading entirely different lives. You guys are good together if you can handle being apart.
- Sleeping in different bedrooms. This can be the kiss of death for some couples, but for others, it works very well. A lot of people have sleeping habits that clash with their partner’s and that makes it difficult for them to sleep in the same bed. When one person is a light sleeper and the other one snores like a chainsaw choking on rocks, that may cause some resentment in the relationship. Choosing to sleep separately is not an imperfection—it just means that the two of you are mature enough to realize that you don’t have compatible sleeping patterns. Everyone needs their sleep. If separate bedrooms work for you and there is no anger over that, you and your partner are good together.
- Making sacrifices. Unfortunately, a fair compromise isn’t always a realistic option. Sometimes, one of you will have to make a sacrifice for the sake of the relationship or for your partner’s happiness. It might be crappy, but it doesn’t mean that you’re imperfect. Sacrifice is a regular occurrence in relationships. If both of you accept that as inevitable instead of an imperfection, you’re good together.
- Realistic expectations. Looking past fantasies and outdated BS while you focus on the hard facts doesn’t make you imperfect. Reality can be very harsh, but it’s reality. Trying to create a fairytale romance out of that may not end well. When you expect realistic things from one another, you’ll make a very good team that can grab life by the balls.
- Boredom. Boredom can be a side effect of the natural course of a relationship. When you’ve been with the same person for a long time, it’s not out of the ordinary to fall into a routine and let things get a little dull. Experiencing boredom doesn’t make you imperfect— in fact, it’s great that you recognize boredom in the first place before it does some serious damage to your relationship. When you both see that things have gotten stale, you’re giving yourselves the freedom and ability to fix those things. Working through that together will make you see that you and your partner make a great team.