Sometimes meeting a guy you really like is even worse than having the longest dry spell ever. Sure, you’re happy to finally have a guy in your life, but now you have to figure out whether or not he’s actually in it for the long haul before you waste any more of your time. You’re a smart woman, so you should never buy these 10 excuses he gives for not committing:
- He’s just so busy. Yeah, so what? You’re busy too. You’re probably even busier than he is. You don’t think that a busy life and a relationship are mutually exclusive, so don’t believe a guy when he says that this is the case. If he doesn’t think you’re worth being in his life, then he’s the one who isn’t worth it.
- He really needs to focus on his career right now. When a guy says this, you might as well laugh out loud because what he’s really saying is that he doesn’t want you to be with you anymore. Sure, the truth hurts, but it’s better to know this and move on instead of crawling into bed crying. Your only response? To tell him to get lost and focus on your own work.
- He’s traveling a lot these days. From all the travel pictures on dating apps these days, you’d think that all guys do is travel the world. If your new guy suddenly gets a random case of wanderlust and acts like he just has to rack up the frequent flyer miles, you can be sure that this is just total BS. After all, people can’t travel 24/7 and there’s a thing called work that usually gets in the way of planning big trips all the time…
- He needs to be free. Ugh. This excuse is literally the worst. It really sucks that so many guys still believe that having a girlfriend means having zero freedom and being stuck in a horrible situation. You should never be insulted when you get this excuse thrown in your face, though. You enjoy your independence, so why would you ever encroach on his? He can definitely go “be free” elsewhere.
- He misses his ex. In most cases, this is a complete lie and there’s no ex-girlfriend coming back into the picture at all. He just doesn’t want to tell you that he’s just not that into you. It’d be a lot better if he could just be honest about it, but either way, you don’t want to be with a guy whose heart isn’t with you.
- He wants to experiment. Sometimes a guy will tell you that he needs to be young while he still can (YOLO and all that) and that he needs to indulge his wild and crazy side. This usually means that he wants to hook up with a whole bunch of girls. It literally has nothing to do with you, it’s just his immaturity and inability to see a good thing when he has one.
- He’s doing a lot of soul-searching. If a guy says he needs to figure out who he is and spend some time alone, he’s really just saying he can’t see himself with you. No one expects to enter a new relationship fully formed without any problems and without making any mistakes. You wouldn’t dump a guy because you quit your job and were looking for a new one, so don’t believe a guy who acts like he’s doing the same thing.
- He’s going back to school. Apparently, guys want you to believe that they can’t study, go to class and have a girlfriend too. Funny, because you remember being in college — and you dated back then too. Yup, this one’s another excuse.
- He thinks things are moving too fast. When you hear this excuse, you have every right to tell the guy off. You’re too smart to treat a new guy with kid gloves in case he freaks out about being in a real grown-up relationship. You’ve obviously done everything right — he’s just afraid to get close to someone, and that’s not your problem.
- He never said he liked you. You’ve definitely had this experience before — you think everything is going great with your new guy and then out of nowhere, he acts like it’s nuts that you ever thought something real was happening. He claims it was always super casual and that he never promised you anything, but you’re not dumb and you wouldn’t get your hopes up. If you think a guy will commit to you, that’s because he acted a certain way and things were going in that direction. When you hear this, along with the other excuses, just know you’re being lied to and all you can do is move on. These guys have definitely done you a big favor.
