10 Rules For A Successful Hookup

Having a solid friend with benefits is a great feeling when you’re single and looking to stay that way for awhile. Going months without intimacy is never fun, but at the same time, picking up random guys isn’t always worth the hassle either. That’s why an FWB who’s always up for an impromptu hookup is exactly what every single girl needs. Here are some rules to follow:

  1. Don’t do it with someone you still have feelings for. First things first. You shouldn’t be having a casual encounter with someone you want something more with. You’re going to end up getting hurt when he continues to treat you like a hookup buddy. It might seem like a good idea to text your recent ex to do it “one more time”, but it’s not worth it. Trust me.
  2. Don’t call him, text him. A text seems a lot more casual than actual using your voice to ask if he wants to come over. You can also avoid the awkwardness of him saying no, or even worse, the risk of leaving an embarrassing voice mail.
  3. Go to his place. If you go to his place, its a lot easier to keep him at arm’s length. Also, you’ll be able to leave whenever you feel like it instead of being forced to listen to him snore beside you all night. Any potential morning awkwardness will be eliminated as well.
  4. Have an exit strategy. Either make sure you have enough money for a cab, or finally set up that Uber account. You don’t want to rely on him driving you home, and public transit can be hit or miss in the middle of the night, depending where you live. If you don’t want to be forced to stay over night, it’s best to have a plan before you head over.
  5. Don’t overstay your welcome. Maybe you like sticking around for a cuddle session and the possibility of morning love-making. But there’s no reason you have to hang out with him for the rest of the day. Accept a cup of coffee if he offers, but other than that, it’s best to be on your way before breakfast.
  6. Make sure you have protection. You don’t want to be getting down to business and have him realize he’s out of protection. A trip to the corner store to buy an overpriced pack of Trojans has a way of killing to mood, so be prepared with your own stash at all times.
  7. Don’t get absolutely wasted. As tempting as it may be to send him a 1 a.m. text when you’ve had a few too many drinks, think twice. A comfortable buzz is perfect casual encounter territory, but it doesn’t take much before you’ve crossed the line into extremely intoxicated. If you’re nearing the vomit danger zone, you should probably go home and wake up in your own bed. You don’t want him to see you as hungover as you’re sure to be the next day anyway.
  8. Don’t make plans too far in advance. If you’re booking an encounter a week ahead, it’s going to feel like a date. It’s supposed to be spontaneous, not meticulously scheduled. Sure, you might run the risk of being turned down when you wait until the last minute, but that’s all part of the experience of a casual encounter.
  9. Ask for what you want. A hookup buddy is supposed to be mutually beneficial, so if you’re not experiencing ecstasy (or a couple) every time, you might as well just stay home and satisfy yourself. If his go-to moves aren’t doing it for you, do yourself a favor and steer him in the right direction. He’ll probably appreciate the pointers too.
  10. Banish all insecurities. You’ll have a lot more fun if you aren’t hung up on how your chest looks when you’re on top, or if your backside looks good when you’re doing it from behind. If he’s making love you, he definitely isn’t scrutinizing your every flaw, so you shouldn’t be either. Just relax and enjoy it!
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to Bolde.com, contributes regularly to AmongMen.ca, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.
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