10 Signs You Still Haven’t Left Your Party Girl Ways Behind

10 Signs You Still Haven’t Left Your Party Girl Ways Behind

While you might have stopped buying your “going out” tops from Forever 21, that doesn’t mean that you’ve left your party girl ways behind completely. If anything on this list rings true, it’s entirely possible that it might be time to slow it down (but you definitely don’t have to call it a day until all of the sequins have fallen off your go-to going out outfit).

  1. You’re never ready to leave when your friends are. You see them start texting their guys while they look at their watch and you know they’re getting ready to ghost – or that all of the gentleman callers are about to arrive and start lurking. Unfortunately, you’re just getting started, and by the time the guys get there your only options are the creepy dudes who’ve been trying to grind all night. You never make friends forever in the bathroom line at a bar, and you doubt you’ll meet the love of your life on a pitch black dance floor.
  2. While your Facebook feed is full of babies, you can’t imagine giving up drinking (and sushi) for such a long period of time. To be honest, the idea of not drinking for nine months is inconceivable. What about a glass of wine after work? Or a new specialty cocktail you just have to try? Even though your biological clock should start ticking any day now, the word “pregnant” still stresses you out. You can’t help but wonder if people are actually *trying* for babies when another announcement for one pops up on your FB feed, ultrasound included.
  3. Sometimes you wake up to new Facebook notifications (and you definitely don’t remember taking any pictures).While that Instagram filter is perfection personified, you can’t remember taking any pictures at all last night, let alone one that warranted Valencia. Hey, at least you weren’t sticking your tongue out or flashing a peace sign in a throwback to Myspace days… in all of them.
  4. You never open a tab at bars because you’re convinced you’ll leave your credit card behind. If you truly don’t trust yourself, you try not to bring cash out at all (but that just means you get other people to buy you drinks). If you’re the least trustworthy human on the planet, you don’t even own a credit card.
  5. You still do shots regularly.  While you thought you’d give up shots after your 21st birthday, you can’t resist one with a particularly odd name. Fireball is never a good idea, but it seems so perfect at the time.
  6. You can remember the last time you were carded, and it’s not because you were at the airport. You’re not exactly going to night clubs, but the bars you frequent do ask for ID at the door. Best of all, someone actually thought you were using a fake the other night, proving that at least you don’t look too old to be partying.
  7. You’ve broken or lost your phone 1-6 times in the last year. Whether you misplaced it in a cab, it’s lying on a bar bathroom somewhere, or the Apple store employee is convinced you drop it (a moment you have no recollection of), you know now to always have a go phone handy.
  8. The floor of your bedroom is covered in outfits you thought about wearing out.  You can’t manage to keep your apartment clean for longer than a day, and you’re only one person — it’s unclear how all those ladies with babies do it. It seems like whenever you’re getting ready to go out you go through every single outfit in your arsenal before ultimately deciding on the first one.
  9. You keep all of your belongings on you at all times.  I mean, you don’t want to call it a “shack pack,” but that’s basically what it is. After all, you never know where you’ll end up, and better safe than sorry. No one wants to walk home in the morning with no makeup on, and no one wants to head to happy hour without an extra pair of heels handy. One swipe of mascara over your day (and night) old makeup will make you feel new-ish again.
  10. You’ve woken up with mysterious bruises.  And even after looking at all of your pictures, figuring out where, exactly, you’ve managed to wake up, and piecing together the evening, you’re still unclear on how they go there…
Margaret is a freelance writer who covers pop culture and fashion in New York City. Her work has been featured in Teen Vogue, xoJane, and Racked. She tweets about her crippling caffeine addiction and teen TV obsession here: @margaretabrams