10 Signs Your Guy Friend Secretly Wants to Be Your Boyfriend

Great loves don’t always begin with approaching a stranger at a bar or swiping right on a dating app. Sometimes, they can blossom out of what you thought was a platonic friendship. Since admitting his true feelings is a risky move for your guy friend to make, it pays to learn the signs that indicate he likes-you-likes-you instead. Luckily, there are quite a few of them! If you’ve been wondering whether you are just friends or something more, check out these 10 signs that your guy friend secretly wants to be your boyfriend.

  1. He asks questions about your dating life. It goes without saying that friends discuss their dating lives. But if your guy friend secretly wants to be your boyfriend, he might show more interest than he otherwise would. Asking about your love life, even in a friendly way, could give him all the answers he’s secretly craving if he has feelings for you. It’ll give him a chance to know whether you’re seeing someone else, casually dating, or free as a bird. And because it’s a slightly more personal topic, it allows the two of you to connect more closely.
  2. And sometimes seems jealous. It’s normal for a guy who’s secretly crushing on you to ask about your dating life. But that doesn’t mean he’ll like what he hears. Pay attention to how he reacts when you talk about other potential love interests in your life. Similarly, watch him when you’re around other guys. If he seems jealous or irritable, it could be a sign that he secretly wishes he was the one with you.
  3. He “jokes around” about being your boyfriend. Although jokes can be just fun, a sense of truth often underlies humor. If your guy friend jokes about being your boyfriend or the two of you becoming a couple one day, he might just be trying to make you laugh. But there’s also a good chance that he’s testing the waters to see how you react to the idea.
  4. He makes excuses to see you alone. When two people like each other, they’ll naturally want to spend time alone. Those opportunities that they have one-on-one allow them to get to know each other on a deeper level and build a more intimate bond. So it’s definitely a sign that he wants to be your boyfriend if he keeps trying to see you alone, rather than in a group setting. If the two of you are good friends, you might see each other alone anyway. But this is still something to keep in mind! Does he often look for opportunities to see you outside of the group, just the two of you?
  5. He remembers the little details. A guy who’s romantically interested in you will pay attention to the little things. He’ll notice details about you that nobody else picks up on—not even your close platonic friends. If you’ve ever had feelings for someone, you’ll know exactly what this feels like. It’s totally natural to be super interested in the objects of our affection!
  6. His friends want to know how you feel about him. Sometimes you need only talk to a guy’s friends to get an idea of how he feels about you. If his other friends have commented about the two of you becoming a couple, or ask you questions trying to gauge how you feel about him, consider that a very strong sign that he likes you. The most likely scenario is that he’s let his friends know how he feels. And whether or not he asked them to say anything about it, they’re just being wingmen.
  7. He makes you a priority. To be clear, a good friend should make you a priority even without having romantic feelings for you. That’s one of the things that helps to maintain a long-term friendship! So don’t confuse a guy just being a good friend with liking you like that. But compare the way he prioritizes you over his other friends, or in comparison with things that are also important to him in his life. If he really does want to be your boyfriend, he’ll probably make you one of his highest priorities and there’ll be a noticeable difference between you and his other friends.
  8. He goes to extra effort to impress you. When you like someone, you want to impress them. We’ve all been there! A guy friend that wishes he were a boyfriend will go to more effort than the rest of your friends would when he’s around you. That might be dressing up, name-dropping, or something else to try and show you how cool he is. Even though you’re already friends and you already respect him, he’ll naturally try to gain your approval if he’s interested in taking it further with you.
  9. Your friends notice. Good friends notice the small details that we tend to miss. That’s why if you suspect your guy friend is into you, it’s a good idea to see what your closest buds think. If he’s been showing signs, there’s a high chance they would’ve noticed. Even if your friends don’t see him often, you can still get their opinion on the way he’s acted when it’s been just the two of you. A third-party perspective always helps to bring clarity to the situation.
  10. He’s often physically close to you. You might have noticed that guys who are attracted to you or romantically interested in you can be touchy. According to Mind Body Green, men tend to use open body language and try to be physically close to the people they’re attracted to. Obviously, touching you without your consent is never okay. But a few innocent things to look out for include him leaning into your space when talking to you and grazing your skin as you talk to each other.
Vanessa Locampo is an Aussie writer who’s equally obsessed with YA fiction and pasta. Her time is divided between writing all the things, reading all the things, listening to Queen, and bopping her cat on the nose. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing and has written for sites including Hotsprings.co and Discovering Montana, and currently works as an editor at Glam. You can keep up with her on Instagram @vanessaellewrites.