10 Signs You’re Way Too Stubborn & It’s Holding You Back

Being stubborn is one of those qualities that is kind of good and kind of bad. On the one hand, you stick to your beliefs and convictions and that’s awesome, especially when it comes to dating. On the other hand, though, you’re kind of controlling. If you think that your stubbornness is getting the way of finding love and truly enjoying your life, this one’s for you.

  1. You can’t be spontaneous. Your life is 100 percent scheduled and you never stray from your usual routine. When someone asks you to do something that’s not penciled into your agenda, you decline. Why don’t you live a little?
  2. You always need to be right. It doesn’t matter if you’re talking to your boss or your BFF or the new guy you just started seeing, you can’t ever be wrong. You believe in yourself so much that you don’t listen to the opinions of others – ever. Yikes.
  3. You plan every date. Yup, even that first date with that guy from OkCupid. You need to be in control of every situation and that includes having a list of fave bars and restaurants that you absolutely must visit on every new date you go on. Some guys will be cool with you making all the decisions and others might want to pitch in sometimes, too.
  4. You’re a little too anti-settling. Look, settling is never a great idea, and it’s awesome that you’re waiting for someone you truly care about. But you can’t be so strict about your list of deal breakers. That’s how you stay forever single.
  5. You always say no. To second dates, to job offers, to party invites – you’re afraid to leave your comfy little bubble and try something new. If it’s not in your grand plan, you’re not interested.
  6. Your future is set in stone. You know you’re way too stubborn if you expect things in your life to work out exactly as you planned. Who does that ever happen to? No one, that’s who. You will never get everything that you want and your successes will look much different than your original dreams. And that’s OK — it’s good, actually.
  7. Your schedule is booked up months in advance. Got asked out by the cute new temp at your office? Too bad because you don’t have any free evenings in the near or even far future. That’s a one-way ticket to forever singledom.
  8. You judge everyone you meet. You do this with potential dates and with potential friends, too. You can’t help but think that people should be a certain way, and if someone seems super unique or unexpected, you’re not into them.
  9. You’re closed off emotionally. Your friends want to get to know the real you and are always spilling their own secrets and emotions. You could care less about letting people see your walls break down.
  10. You never waste any time. Sure, no one likes to have their time wasted, and yet you take that to a whole other level. You shouldn’t actually consider anything, whether a bad date or failed relationship, a waste of time. You’re learning and that’s exactly what you’re supposed to be doing.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.