The 10 Stages Of Giving Up On Online Dating

If you’ve ever actually spent a significant length of time scrolling through the endless faces on Tinder (or any other site/app), you know while that technology has simultaneously made dating more efficient, it’s also way more frustrating. No one would blame you for giving up. At least you gave it a shot, right?

  1. You realize you’ve been spending a lot of time scrolling/swiping mindlessly. Can you even remember the last time you actually talked to someone you were excited about? Even if you come across a guy that seems interesting, chances are something in his profile will turn you off and you’ll go right back to swiping, swiping, swiping.
  2. You vow to actually start trying again. There was probably a point where you stopping actively looking for dates, but left your profile up on all the sites and apps. You figured it was better to have a passive profile than no profile at all.
  3. You give a guy who’s your type a chance and end up regretting it. Part of “trying harder” usually means going on more dates with guys who seem interested in you. Unfortunately, going out with every guy who asks is unlikely to convince you that dating isn’t the worst.
  4. You daydream about how nice it would be to actually meet someone in person. You probably spend way more time than you’d like to admit coming up with elaborate ways to meet the love of your life on the subway, or at the grocery store, or when he catches you after you adorably trip over your own feet crossing the street. Telling your grandkids you met grandpa online just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
  5. You decide you can meet someone in person. You pass by plenty of people on a daily basis, have an active social life, and you’re pretty sure you’re approachable enough, so why can’t you meet someone in person? If you’re out living your life, the right guy will find his way to you. At least that’s what you hope.
  6. You embark on one last messaging blitz just in case. You’re almost ready to go offline, but first you should probably message all those guys you “liked” or swiped right on just to make sure one of them isn’t your soulmate. 48 hours seems like enough time to give them the chance to respond.
  7. You finally disable all your accounts. The only responses you got were one “what are you wearing,” and one guy who was just looking for a third to join him and his wife in the bedroom. Since those weren’t exactly the responses your had in mind, the time has come.
  8. You go through serious withdrawal. After disabling your accounts, you go to bed feeling pretty proud of yourself for being strong, but the commute to work seems to take a lot longer when you have no faces to swipe. You find yourself looking at your phone for possible messages, only to remember you deleted everything. How long before you break your habit?
  9. You reactivate your accounts after a couple weeks, only to find out nothing has changed. You end up caving and signing back in, reactivating your accounts, one Saturday night while you sip a glass of wine in your pajamas. Your FOMO has been out in full force, and you just want to see if there are any new faces.
  10. You finally permanently delete your accounts because you’d rather be alone than continue to be the bitter online dater you’ve become. It only takes a few days and one too many terrible messages from guys you have zero interest in to convince you that you had it right the first time — online dating is not for you… at least not right now.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to, contributes regularly to, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.