For better or worse, texting with someone is a huge part of courtship and getting to know them. Of course, it’s not always easy to keep a guy interested in you via texting before you become an actual couple and start spending more time together face to face, especially since we guys tend to have much shorter attention spans. With that in mind, here are a few tips for keeping him keen on you via text.
- Stay positive. No guy wants to text back and forth with Debbie Downer. Unless he’s your serious boyfriend, you don’t need to use a guy to vent about your bad day. That can be done later. When you’re still in the stage of trying to capture a guy’s interest, always make sure your texts are light and upbeat. Texting with someone you like is supposed to be fun, so make sure it remains upbeat.
- Have a purpose. I know women aren’t like this, but guys usually like to text for practical purposes. When you text a guy, try to make sure there’s a reason for it. Don’t just text “Hi” or “What’s up” and expect the guy to take it from there. Even if he likes you, no guy wants to put up with that. Ask him a specific question or text him to make plans. If nothing else, have a humorous anecdote that you can share with him that will capture his attention and make him want to spend time texting back and forth.
- Keep emojis to a minimum. Sure, emojis can be fun, but only in small doses. Most guys don’t want a text convo that’s full of emojis, especially ones that aren’t a simple smiley face. We don’t want to have to decode what everything means. Even if you’re trying to encourage a guy to use more emojis, try to keep it to a minimum, at least until you know for a fact that a guy likes emojis.
- Spell it out. Most guys are not that savvy at texting. Using shorthand is an easy way to confuse them and lose their interest. Plus, we’re not teenagers anymore, so shorthand isn’t that cute. Spell out your words and maybe even use proper punctuation. It doesn’t sound like a big deal, but guys can get turned off by any little thing, and having to decipher what you mean in your texts can make a guy lose interest quickly.
- Be quick and casual. This is the way that most guys like to text. They don’t want to get too serious and they don’t want to spend large chunks of their day texting. If you want to have a long talk with a guy, just call him on the phone or wait until your next date. Guys don’t want to be having long, serious talks via text. If you’re not sure if you’re texting him the “right” way, just ask yourself if your texting is quick and casual.
- Ask unique questions. If you want a guy to be engaged and interested in your texting, don’t ask him the same old questions he’s probably answered for countless other women over the years. After all, part of the fun of these early chats is getting to know each other. Find fun and interesting questions to ask him that will get him thinking and make you stand out from everyone else who’s ever texted him.
- Take a break. If you’re not an official couple, you don’t have to text every day. You also don’t have to spend all day texting on the days you do call. It’s okay to take little breaks to make him miss you a little. Texting non-stop can make him lose interest just as easily as never texting him at all. In fact, constantly texting a guy can be a major turn-off, so make sure you take little breaks.
- Let him initiate (sometimes). Since guys don’t like texting that much, you’ll probably have to initiate most of the time, but you should still force him to occasionally get things started. When you wait for him to text you first, it gives him the impression that he’s chasing after you. It’s also a good way of measuring his interest in you based on how often he texts you first instead of waiting for you to make the first move.
- Send a few picks. Okay, I’m not saying you have to send a guy you don’t know that well sexy selfies. But giving him a picture of you every now and then can help keep his interest. You probably aren’t seeing him on a regular basis, so reminding him what you look like and how pretty you are can be a good way to pique his interest and make sure he wants to keep texting and see you.
- Tease (a little). Don’t be afraid to get a little flirty or sexy with your texts. You probably don’t want to do that all the time, but some playful teasing every now and then will definitely help keep a guy interested. Being flirty in your texts will make it clear that you like him more than a friend and will make him more eager to ask you on a date and take the relationship beyond texting.
