10 Things You Should Be Looking For In Your Next Relationship

You’ve probably been around the dating block a few times at this point in your life and have been with a variety of people. While you’ve probably experienced plenty of disasters, the not-so-great relationships are sometimes just as important as the amazing ones because they teach us so much, particularly about the qualities that we never want in a partner again. Here is a list of things you should definitely be looking for in your next relationship.

  1. Someone with emotional and mental maturity Having a mature partner is very important and the need for one only increases as we get older. It’s great if you’re the more level-headed and responsible one in the relationship but your partner must meet you at least halfway with some maturity of their own. You have to be able to rely on your partner to grow up when you need them to. You can’t always be expected to be the only adult in the relationship.
  2. Someone who takes responsibility for themselves and their life Similar to maturity, responsibility is something that is extremely important for a long-term partner to possess. You have to be able to trust that your partner is going to make good decisions when they need to. As we get older, the stakes in our relationships get higher. We’re thinking about our futures and things like marriage, living together, children, careers, and that sort of thing. When looking for a partner, always make sure you’re looking out for a responsible person who you can count on to make the right decisions.
  3. Mutual trust Trust is such a huge deal in successful relationships. You have to know that you can trust your partner and that they can trust you. Maintaining a sense of independence is very important to most people. You have to be able to keep your sense of individuality and in order to do that, your partner needs to trust you to have your own life outside of your relationship.
  4. Empathy for one another Your partner may not always understand why certain things affect you the way that they do and vice versa. The important thing is that they show compassion and empathy when you’re upset, angry, or anxious about something, listen to you, and comfort you through it. Your partner should be your safe haven and the person you want to talk to most when you’re going through something hard. If they make you feel silly or bad for however you’re feeling simply because they don’t understand it, that is not being fair or supportive to you.
  5. Someone who prioritizes you It’s so hard to have a healthy relationship with someone who’s constantly choosing other people or other things over you. It’s true that compromise is important in relationships and you can’t always expect your partner to sacrifice their time and resources to you all of the time. However, if your partner doesn’t consider you important enough to sacrifice for and isn’t prioritizing your happiness, that’s not okay.
  6. Someone that you have fun with Fun is essential to relationships and you definitely want to find someone who makes every situation better by bringing their character and sense of humor along. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing together but if you can always find a way to enjoy yourselves, it’s such a special quality for a relationship to have.
  7. Someone who forgives Inevitably, you will disagree or argue with your partner at some point. It’s not about what you fight about, but when you work things out, you have to know that your partner truly forgives you and is able to move on without holding on to any resentment. Neither of you should ever hang things over each other’s heads or dredge up the past whenever you’re frustrated with each other. Once a situation has been resolved, let it go and move on so that you both can be happy.
  8. Someone who cheers you on We all love a partner who acts as our personal cheerleader and encourages us in all of our future endeavors. Your partner should want you to be successful and feel accomplished. Someone who discourages you from going after more or working towards a goal might be intimidated by your power and that is not someone that you want to be with. Look for someone who wants you to be great and pushes you to never give up on the things that you want.
  9. Someone who shares the same values as you This one can be tricky because there certainly isn’t anything wrong with you and your partner having a difference of opinions. However, there are certain fundamentals that may be very important to you and it’s going to make your relationship very difficult if you and your partner don’t see eye to eye on them. You should decide what those values are and why they’re important to you, but there’s nothing wrong with choosing to end things with someone because you foresee your disagreement on certain things causing major problems in the long run.
  10. Someone who never falls out of love with loving you Romance is not dead and the flame never really dies with people who are truly and completely in love with each other. You should look for a partner that looks at you the same way they did the first time they met you even after you’ve been together for years. Relationships aren’t always a walk in the park and you should be looking for someone that you know will have your back through thick and thin and will never get tired showing their love to you every day. You might have to wait a little longer for that relationship but once you have it, I promise you that it will be so worth it.
Shelby is a journalist and fiction writer raised in the South but built for the big city. She's a book nerd (well, an overall nerd, honestly) and coffee addict and obsessed with all things leather and lacy.

She has a bachelor’s degree in Mass Communication and Media Studies from Sam Houston State University and worked for her university newspaper, The Houstonian, as well as serving as a producer and part-time entertainment anchor for Cable 7 Huntsville. You can follow her on Twitter @shelby777.