10 Things You Should NEVER Put Up With From Anyone

There are a lot of things in life that are out of our control. However, we can take charge of our own lives, and therefore our destiny. Our lives are made up of experiences and people that enrich those experiences, for better are worse. And while we can learn a lot from dealing with losers of all kinds, we do often have a choice on whether or not to deal with them. There are a few things that we should never put up with, whether that behavior comes from a best friend, a boyfriend, a colleague or anyone else – even yourself. You’re worth more than that.

  1. Abuse. Abuse comes in a variety of forms. If you’re ever experiencing physical or verbal abuse, you MUST get out of the situation. It’s not your fault. It has never been nor ever will be your fault. No one deserves to be abused or should have to put up with it. If you’re in an abusive situation, please tell someone who will help you safely remove yourself from the situation.
  2. Frenemies. Why would you want anyone who is even partially an enemy in your life? You deserve a life full of positive people. Sadly, all unhealthy unions must come to an end. It’s time to dump the the fake friends and move on to healthier relationships.
  3. Backstabbers. It can be hard to uncover a backstabber since they’re stabbing you when and where you can’t see it. The first time you confirm that you’re dealing with a two-faced traitor, however, it’s time to kick him or her to the curb. This is a character trait that rarely changes and if you allow it to slide once, chances are you’ll be dealing with this duplicitous behavior again in the future.
  4. Mediocrity. People always say that they are afraid of failure, but failure is a blessing in disguise. You learn from failure and eventually move on. It’s mediocrity that’s the real disgrace. Everyone deserves to have the best life possible. Whatever it is that you want in life, try with everything you have to achieve it. You may not get what you want; you may fail. But being complacent and allowing mediocrity to overpower your life will leave you with nothing but regret. If you sense mediocrity coming into your mind or your life, overpower it with everything you have.
  5. Someone who’s just not that into you. Yeah, it sucks being single. It’s lonely and after a few drunken nights of looking at your friends’ Tinder, it seems almost impossible that you will ever find love again. The only thing worse than being single is being with someone who’s just not that into you. It’s much lonelier being with someone who isn’t present because they don’t care. You don’t want someone taking up your time that feels lukewarm about you. If you feel like you’re a placeholder for someone waiting for a better friend or better girlfriend to come along, it’s time for you to part ways.
  6. Anyone who makes you feel inferior. It’s simple. If anyone is making you feel badly about yourself, run as far as you can in the other direction. These are the ultimate wolves in sheep’s clothing. They masquerade as a person in your life who cares about you but takes every opportunity to give you backhanded compliments and tear you down. These people are bullies and come in all forms: friends, lovers, co-workers, etc. While you may not fully be able to get these people out of your life, minimize your interaction with them and keep your relationship surface-y. Don’t give them any private details that they will try to use as ammunition.
  7. Selfishness. It’s true that no one is going to take care of you like they did when you were a child, but when your boyfriend or BFF always put themselves before you, it should raise a big red flag. The nature of relationships is they are reciprocal and if you’re always giving and they’re always taking, it might be time to reevaluate.
  8. Dishonesty. There’s no such thing as a little white lie. Little white lies never stay little or innocuous and you shouldn’t put up with them in any romantic relationship or friendship. Nine times out of ten, if someone is lying to you about little things, they’re lying to you about bigger things. If you know someone’s lying to you about anything, it’s probably time to think about if this person should remain in your life.
  9. Infidelity. No one deserves to be cheated on. It’s a betrayal. It’s heartbreaking. It’s unacceptable. That’s not to say that every person who experiences infidelity should leave their partner, but to say that you have a choice. Choosing to stay isn’t a weakness, but it should be a decision you think very carefully about. Never stay with someone or in a situation because you feel like you have no other options. If you decide you want to work through your issues because it’s what’s best for you, that’s your prerogative, but you don’t have any obligation to put up with an iota of infidelity.
  10. Anything other than what you 100% want out of life. Life is too short to put up with anything that isn’t what you absolutely want. Whether it be a friend, a significant other, a job, your wardrobe- anything! The saying that the only things that are certain in life are death and taxes is true; the rest is malleable. It might not always be easy or a choice that others think you should be making, but you owe it to yourself to let go of anything or anyone who isn’t serving you in your life and adding positivity to it. You have the power to mold your life to create it to be whatever you want. While you’ll inevitably face growing pains during this process, the outcome will be worth the challenges.
Abby Stern grew up in New Orleans and is now an actress, screenwriter, and blogger (who isn't?) trying to keep it real in Los Angeles. She also writes for FabFitFun and contributes to various blogs detailing her unique perspective on dating and twenty-something life in Hollywood. Gwyneth Paltrow is her spirit animal and in her free time, Abby enjoys Bellinis and plotting to steal unattended Birkin bags. Follow her on Twitter: @abbystern