10 Things Your Current Boyfriend Should Know About Your Ex

While you don’t want your ex’s name to pop out of your mouth during every conversation, it shouldn’t be taboo to mention him to your current boyfriend. After all, your past shaped you into the person you are today, which is why it’s important for your boyfriend to know certain things about your old relationships. You don’t have to tell him intimate details about your old sex life or how much better your ex was at kissing, but there are a few things that could make your relationship better.

  1. Why you broke up. If you dumped your last three boyfriends, because they didn’t help you out with housework, then you should let your current boyfriend know. That way, he can stop himself from making the same mistakes that led to your past breakups. If he wants to stay with you, he’ll do whatever it takes to avoid acting like your exes.
  2. How long you were together. If you’ve never been in a relationship that lasted longer than a month, don’t be embarrassed to tell your boyfriend. When you get nervous about introducing him to your family or moving in together, he’ll understand that it’s because you’re not used to being in a serious relationship. It’s better that he knows.
  3. If you were sexually active. You don’t have to give your boyfriend a list of all of the mad places you had sex with your exes. However, if you were sexually active with them, don’t pretend you’re still a virgin. More importantly, if your ex gave you an STD, make sure you tell your partner before he finds out from his doctor.
  4. How serious you were. If your ex proposed to you, or if you lived together, that’s something your current boyfriend should know. Some relationships move faster than others, which means he won’t be able to guess how serious you were based on how long you were together. Sometimes, the short relationships are the most meaningful.
  5. What his job was. This is a simple fact that your boyfriend is probably curious about. After all, most men judge others by the amount of money they make. Knowing how successful your exes were will quench his curiosity.
  6. What your major fights were about. Your boyfriend knows you aren’t perfect, so don’t be afraid to tell him about the fights that were your fault. If you let him know your ex got angry with you for never cleaning up after yourself, then your boyfriend will be relieved to know you acted that way with everyone, and not just him.
  7. If your parents disapproved. If your friends or parents hated your ex, then your boyfriend will be happy to hear it. It’ll make him feel like he doesn’t have to work his butt off to make them like him, because the bar is already set low.
  8. Where you met. If you met your ex through your best friend or through work, then your boyfriend should know, because it means you might run into him again in the future. If you see your ex on a weekly basis, then you better tell your boyfriend about it before someone else does.
  9. Why you liked him. This one might be a little painful for your boyfriend to hear, but it’s important that he does. If he knows why you liked your exes, then he’ll learn what you appreciate most in a man. As long as you don’t compare your man to your ex, then he should be able to learn from what you tell him instead of being jealous over it.
  10. What his name is. You know your boyfriend is going to want to Facebook stalk your exes, so you might as well give him the first and last name, so he doesn’t have to search through your friend list to figure out who the mystery man is. It’s the least you can do.
Holly Riordan is a writer from Long Island, New York who has authored several science fiction and horror books. A graduate of Stony Brook University, she has spent nearly a decade writing for publications including Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Teen Vogue, and more. You can find her on Instagram @hollyrio and Twitter @hollyyrio.