After dating so many jerks for years, being in a relationship with a great guy will feels like a bit of a shock to your system. You’re used to guys who treat you like garbage or are just plain losers, so you’re not accustomed to how great relationships can actually be. The first time you start dating a great guy, here are some of the thoughts that will run through your mind:
This is awesome. When you’re used to guys who blow you off and never show up on time, it’s a surprise when you date someone who shows up early and actually respects you. The first time you find a rare gem like that, you’ll be jumping for joy.
It’s too good to be true. After a few times of him opening the door for you or being nice to your friends instead of being a jerk, you’ll probably be second-guessing this guy. Who would believe that there are men out there who are genuine, kind, and just want to take care of you? It’s hard to imagine that guys like that exist when you’re stuck dating the same type of losers over and over again. But they do exist, so embrace it and don’t fall into the trap of thinking that something’s amiss.
Where have you been all my life? Sometimes it can feel like all the great guys are already taken or stuck under a rock somewhere. When you get into that first relationship with a decent guy, you’ll be wondering where he was all that time that you were dating jerks and getting your heart broken. It’s like a breath of fresh air.
I’m not good enough. After you get over the initial awe of dating such an amazing guy, the self-doubt will often start to set in. You’ll start thinking he’s way too great for you, that you don’t measure up to him and he’s out of your league. But that’s a load of nonsense. You’re fantastic, and it’s about time you started dating guys who are just as awesome as you.
He probably has some horrible secrets. Whenever you start realizing just how amazing this guy is, you might start coming up with crazy ideas in your head that he has some hidden flaw that you don’t know about yet. Maybe he’s secretly a psychopath or he has two other girlfriends in different states somewhere. Surely there’s a skeleton in his closet just waiting to slip out. Don’t buy into the trick that your mind is playing. Chances are, he really is as awesome as he seems. Sure, we all come with a past, but I’m sure his isn’t as bad as you’re imaging it to be.
How isn’t he already in a relationship? You’ll probably be wondering why some other girl hasn’t scooped him up yet or why his other relationships didn’t work out. It almost feels like a miracle that he’s single and available for you to date. Even though the rational side of you knows that people are single for a wide variety of reasons (many of which aren’t their fault at all), it’s still baffling when you find a fantastic man who’s as single as you are.
When’s he going to screw up? If you have it in your head that the perfect guy doesn’t exist, it makes it that much easier to believe that it’s only a matter of time before this one really messes up. We’re all human, so honestly, you’re probably right. But it probably won’t be as big of a mistake as some of the other jerks you’ve dated in the past have made. Try not to worry about it, and just enjoy the moment.
Why would he pick me? Here we go again with the self-doubt. You’re thinking there’s no way a guy like this will last. Why would he pick you when there are so many better ladies out there to choose from? Well, the answer is because you’re a catch. He wouldn’t be interested in even dating you if you weren’t. You have to get it through your head that you’re amazing, too, and he probably feels just as lucky to have you as you do to have him.
Why is he so perfect all the time? Dating a great guy is fantastic, don’t get me wrong. But sometimes when you’re dating a guy who is so perfect all the time, it can sometimes make you feel worse about your own shortcomings. After all, this guy seems to do EVERYTHING right, but you tend to forget important dates or slack off on doing laundry. He has his flaws just like you do, but it can make you a little insecure when he seems to outshine you in everything he does.
Why did it take me so long to find a guy like this? Once you date a really great guy, you never go back. When you do get into that first relationship with an awesome guy, cherish it. You’ll be over the moon and scratching your head wondering why it took you so long to ditch the jerks you were dating before.
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