When a guy (or girl) isn’t good at flirting, their efforts are usually painfully obvious. But sometimes, it’s very tricky to try and gauge whether someone is flirting or not. There are many ways to flirt that don’t all necessarily involve obvious physical signs. Check out the below list of ways guys flirt so you can recognize when he’s putting the moves on you!
Standing close to you. Standing close to you is one of the hallmark signs of flirting. If he’s always standing close to you, it’s possibly because he’s attracted to you and feels drawn to you. Some situations will naturally call for people to stand close together. But if he’s standing close to you when he has no reason to, it’s probably because he’s interested in you. Social distancing laws have made it more difficult and less common to stand close to people. So now it’s even easier to notice!
Making eye contact. Eye contact can speak volumes about the way someone feels. Looking directly into someone’s eyes is usually a very intimate action. If he’s looking right into yours, it could be his very subtle way of flirting with you. Also, pay attention to whether or not his pupils dilate. According to Healthline, dilated pupils can be a sign of attraction.
Staring at you when you’re not looking. Eye contact happens when two people are engaging with each other. But staring tends to be a little more one-sided. If you notice that he’s always looking at you when he thinks you’re not looking, it could be a way of flirting with you. It indicates that he’s so interested in you that he can’t look away. The way he acts when you catch him staring can also be telling. Does he smile and flush red? This could mean that he’s actively trying to flirt with you. Does he look annoyed or embarrassed? Then he could be shyer and less confident about his flirting.
Finding excuses to touch you. When we like someone, we naturally want to be close to them and touch them. One of the most classic signs of flirting is finding excuses to touch you. Often, it will be very subtle actions. He might graze your hand as he’s walking past. Maybe he’ll stand shoulder to shoulder with you so that your skin touches. Or if he’s very confident, he might take your hand and pretend to admire your jewelry. Of course, no one has a right to touch you without your consent. Always speak up about any kind of touching that you don’t feel comfortable with.
Complimenting you. Compliments are simple but effective. Flattery really does lead the way to the heart for some people, so don’t be surprised if his version of flirting includes showering you with compliments. He might tell you that he likes your outfit. Or he might praise something you’re doing. Compliments are usually a safe form of flirting because the reaction is more than likely going to be positive.
Joking with you. To be totally clear, we shouldn’t normalize men abusing or harassing women when they like them. As mentioned, any behavior that you’re truly uncomfortable with, that degrades you, or that leaves you feeling negative is unacceptable. The type of joking and teasing that comes under the flirting umbrella is very kind-hearted and very low-key, designed to make you laugh. It might be him playfully putting his hands over his ears when you’re drunkenly singing at karaoke (if your dream isn’t to be a professional singer). Or dramatically telling you to be careful walking down the stairs if you’ve tripped over once or twice in front of him.
Being different around you than he is around other people. Since a guy won’t flirt with everyone in his life, pay attention to the way he is around you compared with other people. If his personality seems to get a makeover in your presence, that could be him flirting. Maybe he tries to be funnier. Or say things that make him seem cooler. Although nobody should have to change to impress anybody else, this is a classic way of flirting.
Showing off in front of you. Yes, this still happens with grown men and women. Showing off definitely counts as flirting. He might talk about his achievements, try to make you laugh, or win at something in front of you. If he’s more confident, he might even ask you for your thoughts after he does something that he thinks is impressive.
Making sure you can see him. Do you notice that he seems to pop up everywhere you are? Is he always in your line of sight when you’re in a group? Does he hover around you when you’re at parties together, so that you can always see him even if you aren’t talking? This is a very low-risk method of flirting. By just being around, he’s subtly giving you the chance to approach him.
Fishing for compliments. Along with complimenting you, he might flirt by fishing for compliments. The most common way of compliment-fishing is putting yourself down over something you know you’re good at. For example, if he’s clearly got a six pack of abs, he might say, “I really need to work out more.” As cringe-worthy as that sounds, it’s just him inviting you (albeit very obviously) to say nice things about him. This is also a good way for him to see if you’re at all interested, based on whether or not you take the bait.