10 Ways You’re Sabotaging Perfectly Good Relationships

Sometimes, you care so much in a relationship that you end up doing things that drive the other person away. You may cause problems that were never there in the first place, or you may think that there are issues when there really aren’t. It’s easy to get carried away when something is new and exciting to you, but you shouldn’t get so carried away that you’re actually sabotaging a perfectly good thing. These are 10 ways you’re ruining relationships that could have been great if you’d have just left well enough alone.

  1. Neglecting the need for personal space. Even though you’re dating sometime, alone time is still necessary. You shouldn’t have the constant need to see your significant other when he’s not around. Everyone still needs personal space, and you don’t want to spend so much time with him that you get sick of him too soon, or vice versa.
  2. Wanting to be in constant contact. With so many modes of communication at our disposal, we’ve become all too dependent on the idea of always talking to the person we’re dating. We feel the need to constantly bombard him with texts, tweets, Facebook messages, Instagram comments, etc. We don’t need to constantly be talking to him every hour of every day. Eventually, you’ll run out of things to talk about, and that’s when it gets awkward.
  3. Being passive-aggressive when things are bothering you. Although you may not be in constant contact with him, you shouldn’t completely close the lines of communication when something’s bothering you. You should still be able to tell him how you feel instead of holding it in and expecting him to figure it out on his own. He can’t read your mind, you know.
  4. Not trusting him from the start. Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. If you’re suspicious of him from the beginning, then he may get suspicious of you as well, which would  create an inability to have a sound mind when he goes out with his friends… or does anything without you, actually. Trust is extremely important, and you want to make sure you establish that from the beginning.
  5. Picking fights for no reason. If there isn’t any drama in your relationship, that’s a good thing – don’t create it. There’s absolutely no reason to go and pick a fight just because you’re bored. Yes, it’s normal to argue with him here and there, but if there aren’t any problems, then don’t try to create them.
  6. Expecting too much from him. Relationships are give and take, and there should be an equal amount of reciprocity between the two of you. However, you can’t always expect so much from him. Having such high expectations for another person is setting yourself up for failure – you’ll always be disappointed when he doesn’t meet your lofty standards, and that’s unfair to both of you.
  7. Taking him for granted. Although he may not show his affection the same way you do, you shouldn’t overlook the ways in which he does show you that he cares, and you definitely shouldn’t take him for granted. Let him know that you appreciate the things he does for you, no matter how small they are.
  8. Pressuring him into doing something he doesn’t want to do. No one wants to be forced into doing something they don’t want to do. Maybe he’ll end up doing it in the end because he cares about you or because he wants to avoid a fight, but make sure you’re not pressuring him into it, as it’ll only lead to resentment.
  9. Trying to change him. You should love someone exactly the way they are and they should love you the same.  You wouldn’t want to be with someone who wants you to change you, so don’t try to change him. Not only will it not work, but it’ll destroy your relationship.
  10. Trying to plan your entire future. Talk of the future is always scary because we never know what’s going to happen. Things can always change and you can’t always control everything. There’s nothing wrong with bringing up the future with your significant other, but don’t start wedding planning if you’re only a few months into the relationship.
Lindsey is a Digital Advertising Professional and Freelance Writer based in New York City. In her spare time, she enjoys running, traveling, and drinking ridiculous amounts of coffee. Follow her on Twitter @lindseyruns