11 Signs He Doesn’t Care About You Based On Sex Alone

You can tell a lot about a guy based on his bedroom behavior. If any of these things are happening in your relationship, then you know the guy doesn’t really care about you when you’re not having sex. The sooner you know, the sooner you can put an end to what’s going on between you and move onto someone who’s more worthy of your time and attention.

  1. He’s only romantic when he wants some. He never holds your hand in public or gives you a long kiss when meeting you for a date. Unless he wants to get sex, that is. If all that romantic behavior precedes sex, and goes AWOL when it’s not on the table, that’s a huge red flag that he’s only after one thing.
  2. He sends late-night texts. He doesn’t want to chat to you about your day. This is why he never texts you in the morning or when he knows you’ve had a busy day. He wants to start a hot flirting session, followed by asking you to drive across town to his place when he’s lonely and horny. Ugh.
  3. He bounces afterwards. Where’s the cuddling? Where’s the talking? It’s non-existent. Once the sex is over, the date’s over too. He’s got things to do – there’s always some excuse for why he can’t stick around, like an important meeting at work the next morning or whatever. It’s lame.
  4. He doesn’t make eye contact. During sex, he never faces you. He always chooses positions in which you don’t have to face each other. While different sexual positions can be a fun way to spruce up vanilla sex from time to time, if this is always what’s going down in bed you’ll be wondering if he just doesn’t want to connect. He’s trying to eliminate the emotional connection completely.
  5. He skips foreplay. While he might be the type of guy to move past foreplay and go straight for the main act, if he knows it’s important to you but he just doesn’t give it a second thought, he’s only focused on his own pleasure. It’s not about you at all.
  6. He never asks you what you like. Being able to talk about what you both like and don’t like in the sack is essential to help you increase your satisfaction and it’s linked to healthy communication as well as satisfaction in the relationship in general. If he’s not asking you about your sexual needs, preferences, and fantasies, it’s like he’s not interested in connecting on a deeper level. He doesn’t want to date you. He just wants to have sex with you.
  7. He doesn’t return the favor. He asks you to go down on him and you oblige him, but then he never returns the favor. It’s always about what he wants and what he can get. How selfish can you get? If he’s this self-centered in the bedroom, imagine what he’ll be like in the rest of your relationship.
  8. He only compliments your body. He never gives you compliments unless they’re of the physical kind or sex-related. He’ll tell you how hot you look or how your body drives him wild. It’s clear that to him you’re just a sex date, not someone he actually cares about in a more meaningful way. After a while, those sexy compliments start to feel cold because they lack real affection.
  9. He’s moody when you request something. When you express what you would like to do during sex, he resists the idea. He might even become angry or irritable. What the hell? This guy just doesn’t want to compromise or make sex fun for both of you. Again, he’s a selfish lover and would make a horrible boyfriend.
  10. He’s all about speed. Sex with this guy is a sprint, not a marathon, which can make it less enjoyable. He’s always racing to the finish line and leaving you unsatisfied afterwards. Ugh. Keep your clothes on with this one. It’s just not worth it and you’re never going to get your needs met.
  11. He eyes out his phone. This is the ultimate act of rudeness! While he might think it’s okay for his eyes to glance at his phone on the bedside table during sex instead of grabbing it to check his notifications, it’s so not acceptable! He might as well be having sex with himself ’cause it’s like you’re not even there.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.