11 Signs The Spark You Feel Is Real

We’ve all experienced “the spark”—that instant connection where you feel slightly nauseous because of the butterflies in your stomach. But, how do you know if that feeling is an indication of something real or if it’s just your mind playing tricks on you? Here are 12 signs the connection is authentic and one you should hold onto.

  1. You Feel High. You can’t stop smiling whenever you so much as think of this person. Nothing, not even your annoying co-workers, can ruin your good mood. You’re not nuts, you’re happy. It’s common to feel a sense of unlimited pleasure when we find someone we can connect with. Do you feel like you just walked out of a hotbox? That’s a good sign.
  2. You Can Talk For Hours. You’ve only been on a couple of dates and there’s already an impressive amount of banter. Your conversation just flows. It doesn’t matter if you’re talking about the weather or the state of the country, there’s never an awkward moment. You can talk for hours without missing a single beat or getting bored.
  3. They’re Always On Your Mind. You think of him pretty much every second of the day. You’re actually having a hard time concentrating on anything but this person. That’s not a bad thing! It’s good to be a little obsessed, especially in the beginning. Honestly, it would be weird if you weren’t daydreaming about their smile.
  4. You Don’t Have To Sell Yourself. They know what you do for work and where you went to college, but they don’t know your high school GPA. Let’s face it, dating is pretty much just selling yourself to another human being. Not with this person, though! You don’t feel like you have to advertise your accomplishments in order for them to like you.
  5. You’re Emotionally Attracted. It’s not just about this person’s looks. Sure, you like their hair and the way their eyes twinkle in the sun, but you’re emotionally attracted to them too. You like their determination and how willing they are to venture out of their comfort zone. Their good looks are just an added bonus!
  6. You’re Not Over-Romanticizing. You like them, yes, but you’re not browsing for homes or doodling their name in your notebook. You don’t know if they’re your soulmate yet, and that’s a good sign. The fact that you’re not shopping for wedding rings means the spark is real. You’re not interested in them because you’re rushing to find your person—you want to take your time for something that’s right.
  7. You Enjoy Their Sense Of Humor. You don’t have to fake a chuckle when they tell a joke—you actually find them funny (how rare!). Their sense of humor is on par with your own, which is a really good sign! For a relationship to be successful, there has to be a shared sense of humor. Are you guys constantly laughing at nothing? Aww!
  8. You’re Putting Your Heart On The Line. You’re willing to focus on them and just them. You have a history of keeping people on the back-burner just in case, but there’s something different about this person. You don’t want anyone else (not even your friends with benefits). They have all your attention and the best part is that doesn’t scare you at all.
  9. You Feel Weirdly Comfortable. It’s as if you’ve known each other for years. You feel strangely safe when you’re with them, even though you haven’t known them long. Maybe it’s the way they look at you or the gentle way they grab your hand. For whatever reason, you feel like you have their undivided attention.
  10. It’s A Different Feeling. Does it seem familiar, or is it a feeling you’ve never experienced before? A good way to know a spark is real is to compare it to your other sparks. If these butterflies feel the same as the butterflies you had for your cheating ex, then proceed with caution. If it’s like nothing you’ve had before, get excited.
  11. The Feelings Are Reciprocated. Your emotions aren’t one-sided. You haven’t had “The Talk” yet, but there’s really no need to. You can tell they feel the spark too. They make plans on a daily basis and don’t hesitate to reach out, even when they’re busy. You can tell the spark is real when you don’t have to question what you have.
Jordan White is a writer based in Scottsdale, Arizona with more than 8 years of experience. She graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in Rhetoric and Creative Writing in 2015 and while there, she wrote for The Daily Wildcat. She has since written for sites including FanBread, and, of course, Bolde. You can find about more her on Facebook. She has a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about and despises the heat more than anything.