11 Signs Your Relationship Brings Out The Worst In You

You might say you’re happy in your relationship, but if it’s bringing you down, then that’s a serious red flag. Here are signs you’re not yourself and your relationship is actually making you the worst version of yourself.

  1. You’re irritable with those around you. If you find that you lose patience with your friends, co-workers, or family, but you never used to, it could be down to your relationship zapping you of energy. You’re feeling stressed out in your relationship and it’s showing in other areas of your life.
  2. You’re often down. If you’re not usually the type of person to feel down and depressed but that’s been happening a lot, then it could be that your relationship is a rain cloud.
  3. You feel lethargic. A surprising sign that you’re not happy in your relationship is if it makes you feel like you have no energy, even though you used to be able to enjoy the things you used to love. Maybe your partner takes all your resources and leaves you with nothing to use on yourself and the rest of your life. It’s time to set some boundaries for yourself!
  4. You don’t care about other things. You might not have the energy for things that used to be important to you. Similarly, you might’ve completely lost interest in anything that doesn’t involve your partner. It’s not that you’re evolving, but you’re actually just checking out of your life.
  5. You fight a lot with your partner. While you might be making your relationship the center of your world, which is ruining the rest of your world, you could also be having more arguments with your partner. Too much fighting that feels malicious or never resolves issues can quickly become toxic. The result? Your worst version is on display.
  6. You don’t feel like yourself. Who were you before your relationship entered your life? If you’ve become someone you don’t even recognize, it could mean that you’re wandering away from your authentic truth. Even if the changes are thought of as good, they might not actually be healthy. Think about that.
  7. Your career is suffering. You were supposed to work late but then your partner called to see you and you agreed. You had many career dreams but since your partner entered your life they’ve been put on the back-burner. You’re throwing away your career and that’s not worth it for anyone, not even your dream partner.
  8. You never see your friends anymore. Maybe it’s not your career that’s suffering but your relationships with your loved ones. If you can’t remember the last time you saw them, that’s a bad sign you’re not being the best friend you used to be. Remember that there’s more to life than being the perfect girlfriend.
  9. You think about your partner before making a change. When you want to cut your hair into a lob or dye it strawberry blonde, you might consult with your partner first. When a job opportunity to travel comes up, you wonder if you should turn it down because of your relationship. While it’s obviously a good thing to consider your partner in the path you’re taking in life, you should also put your needs and wants first, otherwise, you’re denying yourself the life you want.
  10. You don’t know where you stand. If you’re filled with uncertainty in your relationship, this can cause you to feel anxious, angry, unsettled, and unhappy. Don’t take that doubt lightly because it could be bringing out the worst in you.
  11. You’re waiting for the bubble to burst. If you’re constantly on guard, waiting for your relationship bubble to burst, then something’s not right. Not only do you feel uncertain, but you’re putting all your stress and energy into your relationship, with not much else to go around. If you keep expecting your partner to upset or hurt you, there’s a reason for that. For example, maybe you don’t really trust him. Explore that, because waiting around for bad days to appear is not cool. It just wrecks your optimism and prevents you from enjoying your life.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.