11 Signs You’re Better Off As Friends

If your relationship isn’t working out right now, it could be that you’re just in the wrong category. We’re not meant to be romantic partners with every guy we date. Sometimes, we’re better off as friends and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Here are all the signs that you need to look for:

  1. The best part of the relationship is the sex. If every hangout ends in sex, it could be that you’re both using the physical connection as a way to avoid the emotional one that’s so crucial to a deep, meaningful, long-term relationship. You’d rather not even go there, so instead you have sex without eye contact. This is what couples do, right? Wrong.
  2. You started off as friends. If you started off as friends, that’s where you’re probably meant to stay, otherwise, you would have launched into a relationship the moment you set eyes on each other. It’s hard to turn a friendship into a romantic relationship because there will always be that memory of how you used to see each other and it can feel kinda weird, like in a brother and sister kind of way.
  3. You don’t feel inspired to communicate to each other. You don’t feel like you can be 100% honest with him and that’s a sign that you might be better off as simple friends. You have this feeling that you might hurt his feelings if you tell him the truth or that he won’t take you seriously. Open communication is the most important part of any romantic relationship and if you don’t have at least THAT, you don’t have much of anything.
  4. When you think about all the cool stuff you want to do in the future, it’s not with him. When you think about your future, for some reason, he’s just not in it in any big way. Maybe it’s because you don’t like the same things or maybe he kinda, sorta annoys you. Whatever it is, it’s a huge sign that you’re not meant to be lovers.
  5. There’s a part of his lifestyle that you don’t approve of. Maybe he smokes or doesn’t have a job or can’t talk about serious issues with you. You went into the relationship knowing that it annoyed you but didn’t realize how much of a problem it would actually become. If you disagree with something he’s doing and just can’t get past it even in the name of love, you should pull it back and just stay friends.
  6. You didn’t feel a natural attraction to him in the beginning. There’s a certain chemistry that’s felt when you meet someone whom you’re truly meant to be with. It’s a love-at-first-sight kinda feeling that just can’t be ignored. If there wasn’t even an inkling of attraction towards this person when you two first met, then it probably doesn’t make sense for you to be together.
  7. Relationship dynamics are starting to stifle the friendship. You guys were happy as friends and now that you’re in a relationship, you’ve grown further apart, not closer. You might be having sex and spending more time together, but this new relationship dynamic has placed a new pressure on the whole situation and neither of you are handling it well. In fact, you kinda miss when things were simpler.
  8. Walking by a wedding dress shop gives you anxiety. If the mere thought of marrying this person gives you hives, maybe it’s safe to say that you’re wasting your time by being together. There should be at least a fraction of a “maybe” in your mind that you could possibly get married or share a life together in the future. If not, what are you guys even doing? It’s just a glorified friends with benefits situation, if you ask me.
  9. You feel awkward talking about sex. It doesn’t feel natural talking about sex. It’s almost as if you’re discussing fetishes with your brother or sister. It’s just…not right for some reason. If you can’t talk about what you’re doing, you probably shouldn’t be doing it, and if you’re not doing it, you’re not in a relationship, you’re friends.
  10. You’re very similar. Yo guys look the same, have the same personality, watch the same TV shows, work in the same industry… This can be good to a certain extent, but when you’re too similar, you can sometimes clash and maybe even start to resent each other for the exact thing that you hate most about yourselves. You fell in love because you saw a part of yourself in him… and you’ll probably break up for the same reason.
  11. You spend a lot of time chilling at home together. You don’t really care about dressing up, going out and showing the world that you’re a couple. You don’t really want or need people to know, probably because you’re not totally sure about the relationship. Also, it could be that you’re lacking that man-to-woman dynamic that comes with being in an interdependent, healthy partnership.
  12. You both find lovey-dovey stuff super cheesy. You say “I love you” to each other as a joke, and any kind of cheesy act of love like slow dancing, feeding each other or even sexy stuff like dirty talk is met with giggles. You just can’t be serious about it because it just feels so weird seeing your friend being all “in love” with you. It’s just too funny and a sure sign you’re meant to just be buds.
Jennifer is a playwright, dancer, and theatre nerd living in the big city of Toronto, Canada. She studied Creative Writing at Concordia University and works as a lifestyle writer who focuses on Health, B2B, Tech, Psychology, Science, Food Trends and Millennial Life. She's also a coreographer, playwright, and lyricist, with choreography credits for McMaster University’s “Spring Awakening,” “Roxanne” for the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival, and “The Beaver Den” for The LOT, among others.

You can see more of her work on her Contently page and follow her on Instagram @jenniferenchin.