11 Things He Should Do Before Saying “I Love You”

It’s great when your partner tells you they love you, but it’s not the only thing they should be doing. Their actions count more than what they say. Before your boyfriend utters those three words, he should be doing these things so you know where you stand.

  1. He should ask for your advice. You know you matter when your partner can ask you for your thoughts and opinions on big issues. It shows that he respects and appreciates your advice, and also that he sees you as a team.
  2. He should make you a priority. Does it always feel like your boyfriend has you in his top five priorities, but you’re not in the number one spot? That sucks. Your partner should be showing you on a daily basis that you matter. Sure, he can’t always be available to you, but he shouldn’t make you feel like you need to get a number just to hear from him.
  3. He should want to meet your loved ones. Meeting the folks might be a little OTT if you haven’t been dating for long, but as someone who loves you, he should show it by wanting to be a part of your life – and that means meeting (at least some) people who are important to you.
  4. He should be open about what he wants. Again, it might be too much too soon to tell you that he wants a real future with you, but he should be clear about what he’s looking for. He should explain that he wants something serious, not just a fling, so you know that there’s a real chance with him and he’s not leading you on.
  5. He should call you with big news. Do you have to find out about your boyfriend’s career promotion on social media? That’s pretty shady. If he’s with you, he should show you that he’s sharing his life with you by keeping you in the loop of what’s happening in his life.
  6. He should show you he’s thinking of you. Does he text you because a movie he saw reminded him of one of your previous conversations? Does he buy your favorite powdered tea because he remembered that you couldn’t find it at your local store? It’s little things like these that show you he’s thinking of you and paying attention.
  7. He shows respect for things you love. He might be terrified of horses but he’ll listen when you talk about how awesome it was to ride one. He might not really be into antique shopping but he’ll make an effort to join you just to spend time with you. When you can express what you love to the person you love and they love seeing your eyes light up, then you know that you’re loved.
  8. He should talk about you. He might not be the type of person who boasts about you to his friends, but you should at least know that he’s mentioned you to his loved ones. This is a way of showing you that he’s keen on bringing you into his life instead of keeping you on the DL.
  9. He gets closer to you. Not just emotionally, but physically. No, we’re not talking about taking you to see his new bedroom wall color. We’re talking about how when you’re in love with someone, you want to be as close to them as possible. He should show you that he likes being close to you, looking deeply into your eyes, and touching you.
  10. He’ll do things just because. He doesn’t have to have a reason for why he’s given you a unique purple rose or called you to say “hi.” He just does it, and it says everything – he’s comfortable and things are natural with you, and he wants to be around you as much as possible.
  11. He goes out of his way to make you happy. If he loves you, he’ll hate the thought of something making you unhappy, so he’ll go out of his way to make you smile. He might know that you’re having a bad day so he’ll rock up at your place with a delicious takeaway dinner. He might know you’re feeling uneasy about something even if you’re insisting you’re fine, so he’ll offer his support. He might know that you’re keen on going out with your friends, so he’ll shuffle around your date without it being a big deal. When you love someone, you care about their happiness and try to increase it.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.