You might think you know what traits make up a high-quality man, but if you did, you wouldn’t be dating jerks who don’t appreciate you. It’s not about looks or job title — a good man is someone who compliments your (very) specific personality. Here are the traits you need to look out for to ensure you end up with the guy you deserve.

He Makes You Laugh.

It’s not just about dating someone with a similar sense of humor—you want a guy who can find the humor in any situation and isn’t afraid to look silly if it makes you smile. If he can make you laugh when you’re tired, hungry, and pissed off, he’s a high-quality man.

He Puts Your Happiness First.

Your happiness should be more important than his own (at least sometimes). He should avoid sketchy situations and make communication a priority so you never have to feel jealous or neglected. Even in a brand new relationship, a high-quality guy will work hard to keep you happy. They won’t play hurtful games in an attempt to make themselves look better.

He Respects Himself.

You might think you want a guy that’s passive, but passive dudes don’t respect themselves, and you can’t be doing with that. A high-quality guy will let you take charge every once in a while, but that doesn’t mean he’ll give in to all your demands. In other words, he won’t be a pushover you can control. Trust me, that’s a good thing.

He’s Socially Aware.

He knows how to act in different settings, which means you don’t have to worry about him saying the wrong thing in front of your boss or father. He can read a room and respond accordingly. You might think this is something a lot of people can do but it’s not. A high-quality man knows how to tailor his behavior in order to make good impressions and lasting relationships.

He Takes Care Of Himself.

He’s not a snob about it, but he takes care of himself, and not just physically. He practices self-care. He takes time to be alone and engage in positive activities. He’s not the kind of guy who gets drunk every weekend to relieve his college years. He embraces adulthood and if that means putting money towards healthy groceries instead of beer, he’ll do it.

He Supports Your Decisions.

There aren’t a lot of people out there who actively support their partners and that’s because it takes work. Supporting someone else means listening to them, being there during the bad times, and believing in their dreams. A quality man doesn’t just let you live your life, they help you live your life. See the difference?

He Values Other People.

Not only should he treat you with respect, but he should treat the people around him with respect. How many friends does he have? How do his friends react around him? These are all important questions that’ll let you know whether he’s a high-quality man. If everyone in his friend group can’t stand him, there’s probably a reason.

He Has Goals.

There’s a difference between having goals and having attainable goals. You don’t want someone who’s all talk and no action. You want someone who’s no talk and all action. He might not advertise his dreams to everyone, but that’s because he’s too busy making them happen. He knows what he wants in life and is actively trying to get it.

He’s Positive (Most Of The Time).

It’s not always easy to stay positive in such a negative world, but it’s an important trait. The kind of guy you deserve is one that’s happy. He might get pissed off sometimes, but overall, he loves his life and doesn’t let his bad moods define him.

He Loves Everything About You.

He loves the way you fight, the way you look when you first wake up, and the way you think. It might sound cheesy but a high-quality man will love everything about you; especially the things you hate about yourself. He won’t put you down for your insecurities or make you question whether or not you’re good enough. He’ll make you feel cherished all the time.

He’s Willing To Put The Work In.

A relationship shouldn’t be easy. If it is, that probably means you’re not that happy. Your relationship should be filled with rough times, horrible times, and amazing times. The good news is, a high-quality guy won’t let you go through those times alone. He’ll be around for all of it. No matter how difficult conversations get or how hopeless things feel, he’ll remain strong and present.

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