Getting over a guy is hard. Getting over a guy you never dated, well, that’s even harder. Although you weren’t official, it sure feels like you were. You talked every day, spent time together every weekend, and now he basically acts like you don’t exist. WTF? Whether he ghosted you or slowly faded you out, your “relationship” is over and you have to move on. Here’s how to do it:
- Let Yourself Mourn. Okay, so you two were never exclusively together but that doesn’t mean you’re supposed to get over him faster (and easier) than someone you actually dated. You’re still allowed to feel sad. You’re still allowed to wallow in your bed with a pint of ice cream. You’re still allowed to mourn the death of this relationship, whatever it was, because it’s over now. It’s natural to feel a bit sad.
- Shut down the pity party after awhile. You can take a couple of days to wallow in a dark room but after that, it’s time to stop feeling sorry for yourself and start living your life again. Meet up with friends, spend time with your family, throw yourself into your job or hobbies. It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you do something that forces you to leave the house and interact with humans.
- Don’t Unfriend Him On Social Media. You might think deleting him on social media is the fastest way to get over him. I disagree. Why? Because instead of being friends and being able to see what he’s up to, you’ll spend your time wondering what he’s up to, and that sounds way worse. Plus, deleting someone can cause drama. Just unfollow him on Facebook, stop looking at his Snapchats, and avoid his Insta feed.
- Delete His Number. Although I don’t think you should unfriend him on social, you seriously need to delete his number. I know how hard it is to stop texting someone, but it’s easier when you don’t have their number to text. See the logic there? Delete his number so you aren’t tempted to hit him up every time you’re horny and/or sad.
- Put Some Distance Between The Two Of You. You already know that you should avoid talking to him for the time being but you should also avoid talking with his friends. In order to distance yourself from him, you have to distance yourself from things that remind you of him—his friends, his favorite hangouts, etc. Take the space you need!
- Don’t Stalk The Girl He’s Currently Dating. Is he dating someone? That sucks but unfortunately, there’s nothing you can do about that. And although she’s dating the guy that you’re low-key in love with, she isn’t to blame. She didn’t do anything wrong. However, she’s still the devil and you shouldn’t be friends with her right now—and you definitely shouldn’t be stalking her on social media.
- Go Out With Other Guys. You might not think you’re ready to date again. Well, stop thinking that! If you’re waiting for the right time, you’re going to be waiting forever, so get after it. If your friends want to set you up, let them set you up. If that guy from Bumble is blowing up your phone asking to hang out, meet up with him. You’ve got nothing to lose but everything to gain.
- Accept The Fact That It’s Over. Do you know how people get over other people? They accept the fact that the relationship is over. They don’t just say it’s over, they feel it and they believe it. If a small part of you is holding on to the hope that he might come back, you’re not going to be getting over him anytime soon. If you’re serious about moving on, you have to believe it’s really over between the two of you.
- Actively Push Him Out Of Your Thoughts. You’re going to think about him—that’s only natural. He’s going to creep into your thoughts when you least expect it and sometimes, you’re going to feel like you want to talk about him all the time. Don’t. Whenever he comes up, change the subject. Talk about something else. Think about something else. Swerve your thoughts away from him until he stops being a thought at all.
- Learn From This. I mentioned how important it is for him to learn from this experience. It’s equally as important for you too. Make sure you understand the difference between dating a guy and not dating a guy. Nowadays, the line is incredibly blurred. If you don’t want to be in a situation like this again, don’t give so much of yourself to someone until they’ve proven their commitment to you.
