11 Ways To Stop Becoming Obsessed With Him So Damn Fast

11 Ways To Stop Becoming Obsessed With Him So Damn Fast ©iStock/PeopleImages

It’s really unfair that women seem to get “hooked” in relationships so much faster than men (I’m not entirely sure that men don’t get hooked as easily as we do but they do a much better job of hiding it). Nothing is more annoying than feeling like you’re way more into him than he is into you, right? Luckily, there are a few things you can do to slow the process of falling head over heels so that he can catch up with you.

  1. Have hobbies. The more stuff you have to do, the less time you’ll spend dwelling on how much you think you like him/ are obsessed with him. Not only that, but having goals and passions that have nothing to do with your boyfriend (or potential boyfriend) is incredibly important.
  2. If you can, see other guys. If you aren’t exclusive, then get out there and see other guys. Spreading the love will keep him from being the only guy with your attention, and will remind you that no matter what happens, he’s not the only one out there.
  3. Keep your friends separate. Until you’re sure he’s a good fit for your life (and that he actually likes you a lot, too), don’t bother introducing him to your friends. The more attachments he can form, the harder it’ll be to not be obsessed.
  4. Put down the phone! Stop checking for his texts, emails or calls. Seriously. You look like a lunatic, and he isn’t going to text you every five seconds. Leave the phone in another room and find something else to do.
  5. Don’t stalk him on social media. You don’t need to see pictures of him hanging out with his bros in college, or start driving yourself crazy wondering who that girl was with in him that picture from Spring Break 2006. Do yourself a favor and learn about him from actual interaction, not from your Internet sleuthing skills.
  6. Don’t drop your plans for him. If you’re trying to moderate your feelings, make sure he’s not the number one priority in your life. Don’t change your plans for him. It’ll be a good reminder that you have an awesome life and if he wants to be a part of it, he’d better step up.
  7. Don’t change your rhythm. On that note, keep going to yoga on Tuesdays and happy hour on Thursdays. Men come and go, but you need to keep your life yours until he is worthy of being a part of it.
  8. Make the effort to not make the effort. Women tend to try so hard, and it can be our downfall. So instead of putting the effort into him, put the effort into not putting the effort in… got it? That’s not to say you should be a jerk and act like you don’t care, but there’s really no need to go over the top for someone who’s not reciprocating.
  9. Keep some of your life private for awhile. He doesn’t need to know the year-long feud you and your sister are having or that you’re recovering from a cheater, yet. If you keep some of yourself apart from your relationship with him for awhile you can keep some of your feelings to yourself too.
  10. Don’t introduce him to everyone and their mama just yet. Until you know that he feels the same, he doesn’t need to meet all of your coworkers, your parents, or anyone else super close to you. If they don’t know him they can’t harass you about him, which gives you some time to not think or talk about him.
  11. Don’t spend the night all of the time (or vice versa). When we spend the night sober, it seems to trigger something in our brains that crap is serious and sometimes our brains decide it’s a lot more serious than it actually is. Don’t get caught in this! Sleep in your own bed, and save some of these serious-as-hell feelings for later.
C. is an aspiring yogi and Ph.D student who loves her dogs, bright lipstick and to travel. Find her on IG @drparko121314